Coffee.咖啡-Thankyou.-Cappuccino.-謝謝.-卡布其諾Andanice,hotciderforMonica.摩妮卡的熱蘋果酒Thankyou.謝謝Rach,whydoesmycinnamonstickhaveaneraser?瑞秋,為何我的肉桂棒上有橡皮擦?That'swhy.這就是原因,Sorry.對不起TheOneWithTheStonedGuyChandler?錢德MissTedlock,youlooklovelytoday.泰洛克小姐,你今天真漂亮Thatisaveryflatteringsleevelengthonyou.我能說這件衣服真好看嗎?Mr.Costilickwouldlikeyoutostopbyhisofficetoday.科斯特.力克先生希望你在下班后能到他辦公室去Ifit'saboutthoseprankmemos,Iwasn'tinvolved.如果他是為搞笑備忘錄不是我干的,Nothingatall.Really.和我完全沒有關系.真的.Andfrankly,thoseshenaniganshavenoplaceinanofficeenvironment.弗蘭克,辦公室里沒有地方容納這些惡作劇.Hey,youguys!各位,Chandler'scomingandhehasincrediblenews.錢德說他有天大的好消息Sowhenhegetshere,let'sallact,like,youknow所以他來的時候我們就……Nevermind.Butitwasgonnabereallygood.不管了,這一定很有意思.What'sgoingon?到底怎么了…Soit'satypicaldayatwork...今天和平常沒什么兩樣...andBigAltellsmehewantstomakemeprocessingsupervisor.然后艾爾叫我到他辦公室說他要我當電腦處理的主管-Thatisgreat!-Congratulations!-真是太好了.-恭喜...SoIquit.所以我就辭職不干了Why?為什么?Why?Thiswasatempjob.為什么?因為這只是暫時的工作Chandler,you'vebeenthereforfiveyears.錢德,你已在公司五年了Iknow,butifItookit,I'dbeadmittingthatthisiswhatIdo.我知道,但接受升職不就承認這就是我的目的Doesthatmeanwehavetostartbuyingourowntoiletpaper?這是不是意味著我們必須開始自己購買手紙ThatwasJoeyTribbianiwiththebigpicture.Dan?那是有大照片的喬伊.丹?Wasitmoremoney?這那不是能賺更多錢?Doesn'tmatter.Ijustdon'twanttobeaguywhositsinhisoffice...我不在乎,我不想成為坐在辦公室到午夜...worryingabouttheWENUS.擔心”WEENUS”的人The"WENUS"?Weeklyestimatednetusagesystem.It'saprocessingterm.”每周估計凈值使用系統”這是電腦處理的術語Oh,thatWENUS.那個啊Whatwillyoudo?你有何打算?Idon'tknow.ButIwon'tfigureitoutworkingthere.我也不知道該怎么辦我只知道我不會再待在那兒工作了Ihavesomethingyoucando!我有一份你可以做的工作Ihavethisnewmassageclient,Steve.我的新按摩客戶史蒂芬Anyway,he'sopeninguparestaurant...他開了一家餐廳...andhe'slookingforaheadchef.他正在尋找總廚師-Hi,there.-Hi.-你好.-你好.Iknow.You'reachefandIthoughtofyoufirst.我知道你是個廚師,而且我先想到你ButChandler'stheonewhoneedsajobrightnow,so....但錢德目前沒有工作所以...Ijustdon'thavealotofchef-ingexperience.我沒有太多廚師的經驗Unlessit'sanall-toastrestaurant.除非那是一家只賣土司的餐廳Whatishelookingfor?他想要什么菜色?Hewantstodosomethingeclectic.他想要菜色豐富多變He'slookingforsomeonewhocancreatetheentiremenu.因此他在找一個能創造出整個菜單的人So,whatdoyouthink?意下如何?Thanks.Ijustdon'tseemyselfinabig,whitehat.謝了.我大概沒資格戴白色大帽吧(無法勝任)Oh,Monica!Guesswhat?摩妮卡,考慮考慮?aperfectrun-upandtherehegoes,aperfect...一個完美的積累,然后就自然而然出現了,完美的Watchstufflikethis...看看這個...andyourealizewhyevolutionisjustatheory.你就知道為什么變革僅僅是理論上的事情了.Canyouseemynipplesthroughthisshirt?你能透過襯衫看見我的乳頭嗎?No,butdon'tworry.I'msurethey'restillthere.看不見,但別擔心,它們還在Whereareyougoing?Mr.suitman?你要上哪兒去,西裝筆挺先生?IhaveanappointmentwithDr.RobertPilman,careercounselor-a-go-go!我和羅伯提曼博士有約,求職顧問阿哥哥-Iaddedthe"a-go-go."-Careercounselor?-阿哥哥是我加的.-求職顧問?Youguysallknowwhatyouwanttodo.你們都已找到人生的方向Idon't.還沒Youguysinthelivingroomallknowwhatyouwanttodo.在客廳里的各位全都知道未來該怎么走Youhavegoals.Youhavedreams.Idon'thaveadream!你們有目標,有夢想,但我卻沒有夢想Thelesser-known"IDon'tHaveaDream"speech.少見的”我沒有夢想”演說Ilovemylife!Ilovemylife!我愛我的人生!我愛我的人生!"Brian'sSong"!布萊恩的歌-Themeetingwentgreat?-Sogreat!-見面的結果如何?-相當順利Heshowedmewheretherestaurant'sgonnabe.他告訴我未來餐廳的位置It'snottoobigortoosmall.It'sjustright.就在第十街不太大也不太小,大小適中Wasitformerlyownedbyablondwomanandsomebears?前任老板是金發女人和幾只熊嗎?I'mcookingforhimMonday,kindofanaudition.周一我們要煮一餐讓他品嘗有點像是面試Phoebe,hewantsyouhere.It'sgoodforme.Youcanmakeyummynoises.菲此,他也要你在場這樣對我有好處.因為你可以發出好吃的贊嘆聲-Whatareyougonnamake?-Yummynoises.-你打算做什么?-好吃的聲音.-AndMonica,whatareyougonnamake?-Idon'tknow.It'sgottabegreat.摩妮卡,你要做什么菜?我也不知道,但一定會很棒的Iknowwhatyoucanmake!Iknow!我知道你可以做什么了!Youshouldmakethatthingwiththestuff.你應該用那些東西做這個.Youknowthatthingwiththestuff?你知道用那些東西做的這個?Okay,Idon'tknow.好吧,我也不知道Anyoneknowagooddateplaceintheneighborhood?各位,誰知道附近有約會的絕佳地點?HowaboutTony's?Ifyoufinisha32-ouncesteak,it'sfree.東尼餐廳如何?吃下32盎斯的牛排就免費Anyoneknowagoodplaceifyou'renotdatingapuma?誰知道和美洲豹約會,哪兒是好地點?-Whoareyougoingoutwith?-lsthisthebuglady?-你要和誰約會?-是昆蟲女?"Iloveyou,Ross."我愛你,羅斯HernameisCeliaandshe'sinsectcuratoratthemuseum.她叫希莉亞,不是昆蟲女她是昆蟲博物館的主任-Whatareyougonnado?-Goouttodinner...-你們打算如何共渡?-出去吃晚餐...thenbringherbacktomyplaceandintroducehertomymonkey.然后帶她回我的住處介紹我的猴子給她認識Andhe'snotspeakingmetaphorically.他沒用暗示Sobacktoyourplace?Youthinkingmaybe....回你的住處?你想Well,Idon'tknow....我不知道…I'mhoping....我希望…Thatmonkeyisachickmagnet.告訴你,那猴子是魅力十足She'lltakeonelookathiscute,littlefaceandit'llsealthedeal.她看見它那毛絨絨可愛的小臉然后一切就搞定Celia,don'tworry.He'snotgonnahurtyou!希莉亞,別擔心,它不會傷害你的Soothingtones.用安撫的語調-Here,Marcel.-Ican'tstandthis.-過來,馬修.-我受不了了.-He'sgothisclawsonmy.-Yeah,allright.-它的爪子在我的-乖..Okay,trythissalmonmousse.試試這鮭魚慕斯Good.好吃Isitbetterthantheothersalmonmousse?比其他的鮭魚慕斯好吃?-It'screamier.-Yeah?Well,isthatbetter?-更滑更柔.-是嗎?這樣更好?Idon'tknow.We'retalkingaboutwhippedfish.我不知道.我們在談一條攪成泡沫的魚I'mjusthappyI'mkeepingitdown.我能不吐出來就已經不錯了God,whathappenedtoyou?天啊,你怎么了?Eightandahalfhoursofaptitudetests...8個半小時的性向測驗...intelligencetests,personalitytests,andwhatdoIlearn?智力測驗,個性測驗,我了解了什么?"You'resuitedfordataprocessingforalargemultinationalcorporation."你適合在大型跨國公司資料處理部門方面發展That'ssogreat!Youalreadyknowhowtodothat.這太好了因為你已知道該如何做Canyoubelieveit?你們能相信嗎?Don'tIseemlikeIshouldbedoingsomethingcool?我不像是做那種酷工作的人嗎?Ijustalwayspicturedmyselfdoingsomething....我總是想像自己能做點事情Something!事情!Chandler,Iknow,Iknow.錢德,我知道Hey,youcanseeyournipplesthroughthisshirt.嗨,你可以透過你的襯衫看自己的乳頭Maybethiswillcheeryouup.這個或許能讓你開心點Ihadagrapeaboutfivehoursago,soIbettersplitthiswithyou.5小時前我吃了一顆葡萄所以我最好該和你平分It'ssupposedtobesmall.It'sapre-appetizer.它本來就應該那么小這是餐前開胃菜TheFrenchcallitanamuse-bouche.法國人稱它為”阿姆茲布許”Well,itisamusing.這簡直是太神奇了Hi,Wendy.Yeah,8:00.溫蒂,對,八點Whatdidwesay,$10anhour?我們不是說過嗎?每小時十塊Okay,great.Allright,I'llseeyouthen.很好,再見了-$10anhourforwhat?-Awaitressfromworkishelpingme.-什么每小時十塊?-我請餐廳里的女服務生幫忙Waitressing?服務生?OfcourseIthoughtofyou.But....當然我考慮過你.但...-But....-But,but....-但是…-但是什么?Butit'sjustthisnighthastogojustperfect,youknow?但是這今晚一定要做到完美,你知道嗎?Wendy'smoreofaprofessionalwaitress.溫蒂的經驗豐富,是個職業服務生AndI'mmaintainingmyamateurstatussoIcanwaitressintheOlympics.我應該繼續保持業余的姿態將來才能在奧運會上當服務生Idon'tmeantobrag,butIwaitedtablesatlnnsbruckin'76.我不想自吹自擂但我在76年的因斯布魯克當過服務生Tookhomeabronze.帶回家一塊銅牌.Amuse-bouche?阿姆茲-布許?Talktome.對我說話Aweirdthinghappenedonthetrainthismorning早上我坐地鐵時發生了一件詭異的事Talkdirty.說狠褻的話-Here?-Comeon.-這里?-對.Saysomethinghot.說點火辣的What?What?什么?什么?Vulva.外陰.Vulva?外陰?Ipanicked,allright?Shetookmebysurprise.我當時好害怕,她嚇了我一跳Butitwasn'tatotalloss.Weendedupcuddling.但并未完全失去自我.我們以愛撫收場Youcuddled?Howmanytimes?愛撫?幾次?Shutup.Itwasnice.閉嘴,那種感覺好好Idon'tthinkI'madirty-talkingkindofguy.我不是那種講狠褻話的人Justsaywhatyouwannadotoher.Orwhatyouwanthertodotoyou.你只要說出你想對她如何或是你想她對你如何Orwhatotherpeoplemightbedoingtoeachother.或是別人想對彼此如何I'lltellyouwhat.Trysomethingonme.這樣吧,對我說吧Pleasebekidding.開什么玩笑Whynot?有何不可,Justcloseyoureyesandtellmewhatyou'dliketobedoingrightnow.只要閉上眼睛告訴我現在你想干什么I'minmyapartment....好吧…我在我的住處-Yeah,whatelse?-You'renotthere.-然后呢?-你不在那里.-We'renothavingthisconversation.-Allright,I'llstart.Ready?-我們在進行這樣的談話.-好的,我要開始了,準備好了嗎?Oh,Ross...噢,羅斯...yougetmesohot.Iwantyourlipsonmenow.你讓我欲火焚身,我要你舔我-Nowyousaysomething.-Ireallydon'tthinkso.-該你了.-我看還是算了吧Youlikethiswoman,right?Youwannaseeheragain,right?你喜歡她吧?想再見到她嗎?Ifyoucan'ttalkdirtytome,howwillyoutalkdirtytoher?如果你無法對我說出狠褻的話你如何對她說呢?Nowtellmeyouwannacaressmybutt!說你想愛撫我的屁股Okay,turnaround.好吧,轉過去Idon'twantyoustaringatme.我不想你盯著我看Allright,I'mnotlooking.Goahead.好吧,我不看,說吧Okay.Iwant,Okay,Iwant...我要......tofeelyourhot,softskinwithmylips.用我的雙唇感覺你那光滑的皮膚Thereyougo.Keepgoing,keepgoing.這就對了,繼續Iwanttotakemytongueand我要用我的舌頭…Sayit.快說啊Sayit!快說runitalloveryourbody...舔遍你的全身...untilyou'retremblingwith直到你顫抖…With?然后呢?-Funnystory.-You'renotgonnabelievethis.-真好笑-你不會相信的Iwasalwaysrootingforyoutwokidstogettogether.我一向贊成你們兩個小子交往-Thetremblingthingwasnice.-Shutup!-顫抖那一段不錯.-閉嘴!Thatguyfromyouroldjobcalledagain.你睡覺時老東家又打電話來-Again?-Andagainandagainandagain.-又打來?-一遍又一遍.Andagain.又打來了Hey,Mr.Costilick.How'slifeonthe15thfloor?科先生,15樓的情況如何?Yeah,Imissyoutoo.我也想念你.It'salotlesssatisfyingtostealpensfromyourownhome.對,偷家里的筆不夠刺激That'sverygenerous.Butthisisn'taboutthemoney.你真慷慨,但這不是錢的問題Ineedmorethanajob.IneedsomethingIreallycareab我需要的不只是一份工作我要的是我真正想要的That'sontopoftheyear-endbonus?這是你稍早提過的年終紅利之外的津貼?Yourdream!你的夢想…Look,Al,I'mnotplayinghardballhere,okay?艾爾,我不是在故意為難你Thisisnotanegotiation.Thisisarejection!這不是交涉,這叫拒絕Stopsayingnumbers!不,別再講數字了I'mtellingyou,you'vegotthewrongguy!告訴你,你看錯人了I'llseeyouMonday!星期一見Wow!It'shuge!It'ssomuchbiggerthanthecubicle.好大,比小格子大多了Thisisacube!這是一個格間!Lookatthis.看這里.Youhaveawindow!你有窗戶!Yes,indeed-y.Withabeautifulviewof沒錯,還有美麗的風…Look!Thatguy'speeing!看,有人在小便That'senoughoftheview.Checkthisout.風景看夠了,看這個Okay,sitdownhere.坐下Thisisgreat.這個最酷,-Youready?-Yeah.-準備好沒?-好了Helen,couldyoucomeinhere?海倫,能進來一下嗎?Thankyou,Helen.That'llbeall.謝謝你,海倫,沒事了LasttimeIdothat.Ipromise.最后一次了,我保證-Shedoesn'tseemverywarm.-Iknow.Shehasnopersonality.-她看起來不怎么熱情.-我知道.她沒有個性.Wendy,don'tdothistome.溫蒂,不要這樣對我.Wehadadeal.Yeah,youpromised.我們約好的.你答應過我-Whowasthat?-Wendybailed.-那是誰?-叛徒溫蒂Ihavenowaitress.我沒服務生了That'stoobad.Bye-bye.真是太糟糕了.再見Tendollarsanhour!Twelvedollarsanhour!一小時十元!一小時十二元!IwishIcould,butI'vemadeplanstowalkaround.我希望可以但我已經計劃好去走走Whenyouranoutonyourwedding,Iwasthere.你逃婚之后我一直關心你Iputaroofoveryourhead!Ifthatmeansnothing....我讓你有地方住如果這樣對你仍毫無意義…Twentydollarsanhour.一小時二十元Done.成交Hello.WelcometoMonica's.MayItakeyourcoat?歡迎光臨摩尼卡的廚房我能拿你的外套嗎?-Hi,Steve.-Hello,Monica.-史帝頭-摩妮卡Hello,greetergirl.招待小姐-ThisisRachel.-Yeah,okay.-她叫瑞秋.-好的,Everythingsmellssodelicious.味道好香Ican'tremembereversmellingsuchadeliciouscombinationof我早已忘記這種…Okay,smells.香味-It'salovelyapartment.-Thankyou.Wouldyoulikeatour?-這房子真漂亮-謝謝,想參觀一下嗎?Iwasjustbeingpolite,butallright.我只是客套一下,但,好吧-What'sup?-lnthecabonthewayover...-怎么了?-他坐計程車來時...Steveblazedupadoobie.燃了一根草What?什么?Smokedajoint,youknow?Litabone.Weed,hemp,ganja抽了一根大麻…好了,我懂I'mwithyou,Cheech.我和你在一起,cheech.-Doyouthinkhe'sgonnabecool?-lsitdryinhere?-你認為他會冷靜嗎?-這里很干燥嗎?Letmegetyousomewine.我來為你倒杯酒Ithinkwe'rereadyforourfirstcoursetoo.我們可以上第一道菜了Thesearerockshrimpravioliinacilantroponzusauce...這些是石蝦小方餃...withjustatouchofminced...芫萎調味醬加上一點點…...ginger.碎姜Well,smackmyassandcallmeJudy!打我屁股叫我朱蒂-Thesearefantastic!-Gosh!I'msogladyoulikedthem.-真是太好吃了-我真高興你喜歡Likethem?Icouldeat100ofthem!喜歡?我可以吃下上百個That'sallthereisofthese...只有這一些...butinafewminutes,we'llservesometartlets.但再過8分半鐘我們就會獻上美味的洋蔥餡餅"Tartlets"?餡餅..."Tartlets."餡餅..."Tartlets."餡餅...Wordhaslostallmeaning.文字都已失去意義Excuseme.CanIhelpyouwithanything?請問需要任何幫忙嗎?Youknow,Idon'tknowwhatI'mlookingfor.你看,我也不知道自己在找什么Cool!Tacoshells!酷,墨西哥餡餅They'relikealittlecornenvelope,youknow?這個就像是玉米卷-Youdon'twannaspoilyourappetite.-Hey,Sugar-O's!-你不該影響食欲.-糖歐Youknow,ifyoujustwaitanother61/2minutes再等6分鐘半Macaroniandcheese!Wegottamakethis!乾酪通心面!我們要做這個-No,wedon't.-Oh,okay.-不,我們不做-哦,好吧.Sorry.抱歉Whydon'tyoujusthaveaseathere?我們何不坐這兒-Givemethegummybears.-No.-小熊軟糖給我.-不-Givethemtome.-We'llshare.-把他給我-好吧,分你一半-No.Givemethebears.-Youcan'thaveany.-小熊給我-你不能全部搶走It'snotworthit!這樣不值得!Bearsoverboard!They'redrowning!小熊落水了,他們快淹死了Don'tjuststandthere.Call9-1-1.不要站在那里.打9-1-1.Hey,fellas,grabontoaSugar-O!Saveyourselves!嗨,伙計們,抓住糖歐逃命啊!Help!Help,I'mdrowning!救命啊....我淹水了-That'sit!Dinnerisover!-What!Why?-我受夠了,晚餐結束-什么?為什么?Why?WhatifIcameintoyourofficeandIstarted...?什么?試想一下我到你的辦公室然后開始...?Ican'tthinkofanexample.我想不出一個合適的例子.I'vewaitedsevenyearsforanopportunitylikethis...這機會我已等了七年...andyoucan'twait41/2minutesforatartlet?而你卻等不了四分半鐘之后再吃洋蔥餡餅SoItoldhim,"I'msorry.That'showIfeel."所以我跟他說,"對不起.這就是我的感受."AndhetoldmeIharsh-edhisbuzz.他居然說我聲音太刺耳搞得他耳朵嗡嗡叫ThenIsaid,"Don'teatthat.It'sakitchenmagnet."然后我說,"別吃這個,這是廚房磁鐵"Andhedidn'tlisten,sowelefthimintheemer