1、假設(shè)你是紅星中學(xué)高三學(xué)生李華。請(qǐng)根據(jù)下面四幅圖的先后順序，寫(xiě)一篇英文周記，記述你確定大學(xué)志愿的過(guò)程。命題指導(dǎo)思想新課程標(biāo)準(zhǔn)命題指導(dǎo)思想高考評(píng)價(jià)體系，五個(gè)基本原則：突出方向性（培養(yǎng)什么人）堅(jiān)持科學(xué)性反映時(shí)代性（全民抗疫）體現(xiàn)民族性突顯公共性假設(shè)你是紅星中學(xué)高三學(xué)生李華。請(qǐng)根據(jù)下面四幅圖的先后順序，寫(xiě)一篇英文周記，記述你確定大學(xué)志愿的過(guò)程。命題考慮維度：一模時(shí)間：4月初，5月初；高考前志愿確定與每一位高三學(xué)生緊密相關(guān)；時(shí)代感：疫情期間各行各業(yè)涌現(xiàn)出各種有時(shí)代擔(dān)當(dāng)?shù)挠⑿廴宋?，這樣的正能量應(yīng)該傳播，青少年在志愿選擇的時(shí)候，不能僅僅考慮個(gè)人發(fā)展（人與自我，人與社會(huì)），國(guó)家的發(fā)展，社會(huì)的需要應(yīng)該成為學(xué)生考

2、慮的一個(gè)方面。志愿選擇是一個(gè)長(zhǎng)期深思熟慮的結(jié)果，但在確定過(guò)程中，經(jīng)常有一個(gè)激發(fā)興趣或靈感的時(shí)刻或事件。審題建議記述你確定大學(xué)志愿的過(guò)程要點(diǎn)：四幅圖最核心的動(dòng)詞短語(yǔ)，故事的主線父母詢問(wèn)/與父母討論（大學(xué)專業(yè)）上網(wǎng)查詢看新聞聯(lián)播受到啟發(fā)告知父母自己決定了（大學(xué)專業(yè)）必要細(xì)節(jié)：缺少它故事將不夠完整或不連貫父母詢問(wèn)/與父母討論（大學(xué)專業(yè)）吃飯的時(shí)候（和諧家庭氛圍）還在猶豫中上網(wǎng)查詢目標(biāo)大學(xué)網(wǎng)頁(yè)；相關(guān)專業(yè)情況；看新聞聯(lián)播受到啟發(fā)看到各行各業(yè)體現(xiàn)出各自的時(shí)代擔(dān)當(dāng)告知父母自己決定了（大學(xué)專業(yè)）我要向新聞中的人物一樣，所以決定學(xué)習(xí)爸媽贊許“時(shí)代擔(dān)當(dāng)”的處理:可以是新聞主題；everyone should sh

3、oulder the responsibilities granted.也可以是集體稱號(hào)；life model， role model可添加細(xì)節(jié)：合情合理，為中心做貢獻(xiàn)，篇幅不超過(guò)要點(diǎn)和必要細(xì)節(jié)。父母詢問(wèn)/與父母討論（大學(xué)專業(yè)）吃飯的時(shí)候（和諧家庭氛圍）還在猶豫中吃飯閑聊過(guò)程中，高考臨近，父母關(guān)心；依然徘徊中上網(wǎng)查詢目標(biāo)大學(xué)網(wǎng)頁(yè)；相關(guān)專業(yè)情況；網(wǎng)絡(luò)獲取了很多關(guān)于志愿和部分專業(yè)的信息，但依然拿不準(zhǔn)看新聞聯(lián)播受到啟發(fā)看到各行各業(yè)體現(xiàn)出各自的時(shí)代擔(dān)當(dāng)；感動(dòng)；備受鼓舞；激發(fā)了自己的社會(huì)責(zé)任感；祖國(guó)需要什么樣的人？告知父母自己決定了（大學(xué)專業(yè)）我要向新聞中的人物一樣，所以決定學(xué)習(xí)爸媽贊許我決心學(xué)習(xí)*專業(yè)

4、，要做一個(gè)對(duì)社會(huì)有用的人提示：志愿:major/(profession/career ) 關(guān)鍵詞不會(huì)，可以paraphrase!What I wanted to learn.What I chose to be.但：關(guān)鍵名詞通篇錯(cuò)誤，最高12分；SubjectUniversity CollegeCourse majority professor college willing 本題總分為20分，按5個(gè)檔次給分。一檔文18-20分二檔文15-17分三檔文12-14分四檔文6-11分五檔文1-5分 2評(píng)分時(shí)，先根據(jù)文章的內(nèi)容和語(yǔ)言質(zhì)量初步確定其檔次，然后以該檔次的要求來(lái)衡量，確定或調(diào)整檔次，最后給

5、分。3評(píng)分時(shí)應(yīng)考慮：內(nèi)容要點(diǎn)的完整性、上下文的連貫性、詞匯和句式的多樣性及語(yǔ)言的準(zhǔn)確性。4拼寫(xiě)、標(biāo)點(diǎn)符號(hào)或書(shū)寫(xiě)影響內(nèi)容表達(dá)時(shí)，應(yīng)視其影響程度予以考慮。英、美拼寫(xiě)及詞匯用法均可接受。5詞數(shù)少于60，從總分中減去1分。 The past week was by no means ordinary, for I had finally decided on my major. This Monday, the topic was brought up again by my parents during dinner. As I still hadnt made up my mind, I deci

6、ded to do more research. Later that evening, I turned to the Internet for help. Faced with so many choices, I seemed to be lost. I noted down one after another major, but crossed them all off, for what I wanted was one that could make a difference in peoples lives. The inspiration came unexpectedly

7、with the CCTV News yesterday. It focused on role models of our time police officers, 范文 18分healthcare workers, delivery men who guarded us and ensured our life ran normally. Suddenly, I realized my lifes purpose relieving pain and saving lives. And to pursue this call, I decided to specialize in med

8、ical science. I jumped excitedly at this idea. Mom and dad were also happy that I had found the compass for my future life. Now, determined to become a healthcare worker, whenever I start my schoolwork, I know I am studying for a noble cause. (187 words)考場(chǎng)學(xué)生作文 19分 This winter vacation I decided on m

9、y major in college after a long time of hesitation , which was inspired by the current affairs. During the lunch time on an ordinary day, my parents asked me about my opinion towards my major in college. Noticing my confusion, they kindly put forward several suggestions including maths and physics ,

10、 but none of them struck my chord(引起某人共鳴）. Fully aware of the importance of deciding on my future plan after the lunch,I started to search for relevant information . As such a variety of majors ranging from education to biology flooded into my eyes, I became even more confused . Seeing college stude

11、nts sharing on the website about how tough each course was .I felt several of my weak ideas faded away. Feeling anxious and confused , I walked out of my room to join my family for a news report. As the screen lit up, a group of doctors wearing masks and uniforms caught my eye. I had been aware of t

12、he severe situation of the Coronavirus these days and knew the doctors played a vital role in fighting against virus , but hardly had I reached their work. At that moment , aware of the magic of their treatment and their bravery to shoulder the responsibility of a new era, I felt my heart was lit up

13、 like a Christmas tree. Jumping out of the sofa, I announced to my parents that I would study medicine. As they gave their thumbs-up, I felt my growth for being independent to decide my own future and take the duty to be a qualified citizen to make contribution.一模情景作文集中體現(xiàn)的問(wèn)題：中文思維，英語(yǔ)翻譯，句型結(jié)構(gòu)生搬硬套，不具體，想

14、要讓閱卷老師腦補(bǔ)才能理解；時(shí)態(tài)混亂；低端錯(cuò)誤：?jiǎn)螐?fù)數(shù)，動(dòng)詞形式等；審圖不清：關(guān)鍵信息錯(cuò)誤，導(dǎo)致要點(diǎn)缺失；1.I went to the living room, hoped to find2. It occurred to me that why not choose3. Havent considering about the major,.4. with the disappointed 5.social society6. help people with sick7.I made a finally choice8. No matter time goes by9. They aske

15、d me what do you 10.After listening my parents said11. There has12. The unknowing world13.As widely known,一模后寫(xiě)作教學(xué)建議審題專項(xiàng)訓(xùn)練：準(zhǔn)確審讀文字，理解整體要求；讀懂四幅圖，準(zhǔn)備提取要點(diǎn)；添加必要細(xì)節(jié)，讓文本流暢并符合邏輯；適當(dāng)添加細(xì)節(jié)，回避流水賬；加強(qiáng)文章內(nèi)容可讀性，生動(dòng)性（因題：臨場(chǎng)發(fā)揮）研讀范文（包括閱讀文本，完型文本），建立語(yǔ)料庫(kù)，并準(zhǔn)確靈活地遷移；高頻要點(diǎn)表達(dá)法梳理，比如：通知，參觀，體驗(yàn)，制作，展示，照相等高頻要點(diǎn)如何表述更加準(zhǔn)確更加豐富/準(zhǔn)確。圍繞常見(jiàn)主題進(jìn)行整理，比如環(huán)

16、保，感恩，責(zé)任擔(dān)當(dāng)，社會(huì)主義核心價(jià)值觀篇章布局，書(shū)寫(xiě)，卷面等。 The past week was by no means ordinary, for I had finally decided on my major. This Monday, the topic was brought up again by my parents during dinner. I had asked myself the same question many times, but still couldnt make up my mind. Seeing my hesitant look, mom pat

17、ted me on my shoulder, her smile encouraging me to do more research. Later that evening, I turned to the Internet for help. Faced with so many choices, I seemed to be lost. Law could be a good choice. Business and computer science were also attracting top范文 20分students. I noted down one after anothe

18、r major, but crossed them all off, for what I wanted was a profession that could make a difference in peoples lives. The inspiration came unexpectedly with the CCTV News yesterday. The moment “Role Models of Our Time” appeared on the screen, I was awed. The news story focused on superheroes without

19、a cape - police officers, healthcare workers, delivery men, city cleaners-who guarded us and ensured our life ran normally. Suddenly, I realized my lifes purpose relieving pain and saving lives. And to pursue thiscall, I decided to specialize in medical science. I jumped excitedly at this idea. Mom

20、and Dad were also happy that I had found the compass for my future life, and said they would be so proud to see me in white. Now, determined to become a healthcare worker, whenever I start my schoolwork, I know I am studying for a noble cause. (252 words)閱卷樣文第五檔（1-5分）未完成試題規(guī)定的任務(wù)。明顯遺漏主要內(nèi)容句式單調(diào)，詞匯貧乏語(yǔ)法或用

21、詞方面錯(cuò)誤較多，嚴(yán)重影響了對(duì)所寫(xiě)內(nèi)容的理解。第六檔（0分）未能傳達(dá)任何信息；所寫(xiě)內(nèi)容與要求無(wú)關(guān)。0 分作文空白卷沒(méi)有與題目相關(guān)的信息（隨意默寫(xiě)，謄寫(xiě)閱讀文本）無(wú)法識(shí)別的試卷寫(xiě)了很多，但沒(méi)有一句話正確中文答卷標(biāo)記作文建議給分：3建議給分：5鼓勵(lì)每個(gè)句子都寫(xiě)正確。512的差異；第四檔（6-11分）未恰當(dāng)完成試題規(guī)定的任務(wù)。漏掉或未描述清楚主要內(nèi)容。所用句式和詞匯有限。語(yǔ)法或用詞方面的錯(cuò)誤影響了對(duì)所寫(xiě)內(nèi)容的理解。未能清楚地傳達(dá)信息。建議給分：6評(píng)語(yǔ)：全文4段，5句話。每一句都有低端錯(cuò)誤。僅僅有部分有效信息。建議給分：8要點(diǎn)動(dòng)詞不精準(zhǔn)，told;關(guān)鍵詞通篇錯(cuò)誤Subject必要細(xì)節(jié)不精準(zhǔn)：movie建

22、議給分：9圖四要點(diǎn)不準(zhǔn)確，不能及格；且多處低端語(yǔ)法錯(cuò)誤，影響閱讀；建議給分：10基本完成了寫(xiě)作任務(wù)，但：關(guān)鍵詞錯(cuò)誤；時(shí)態(tài)錯(cuò)誤、單復(fù)數(shù)錯(cuò)誤、人稱代詞 錯(cuò)誤建議給分：11從卷面和前半部分寫(xiě)作完成情況看，似乎可以上一檔文，但圖四要點(diǎn)表述不完整；因此不及格。提醒：閱卷不能被卷面迷惑，要讀文章！建議：鍛煉學(xué)生把握要點(diǎn)的情況下發(fā)揮。第三檔(12-14分)基本完成了試題規(guī)定的任務(wù)。覆蓋內(nèi)容要點(diǎn)。運(yùn)用的句式和詞匯基本滿足任務(wù)的要求。語(yǔ)法和用詞有一些錯(cuò)誤，但不影響理解。基本達(dá)到了預(yù)期的寫(xiě)作目的。建議給分：12完成任務(wù)；且波浪線部分是處理得當(dāng)?shù)牡胤剑珪r(shí)態(tài)混亂（如果時(shí)態(tài)全部正確，可以得14分）；低端語(yǔ)法錯(cuò)誤，檔內(nèi)

23、低分處理。12如果不看卷面，不看低端錯(cuò)誤，該作文言簡(jiǎn)意賅，得分應(yīng)該更高。但遺憾的是低端錯(cuò)誤有四處以上，視為基本完成寫(xiě)作任務(wù)。12完成了寫(xiě)作任務(wù)，但低端語(yǔ)言錯(cuò)誤，比如時(shí)態(tài)錯(cuò)誤，讓作文僅得及格分。建議給分：13又是一篇欺騙性強(qiáng)的“優(yōu)秀文章”完成了寫(xiě)作任務(wù)，本可以是一篇二檔文，但低端錯(cuò)誤太多了，影響了閱讀。沒(méi)有寫(xiě)完，但是要點(diǎn)已經(jīng)齊全！13建議給分：14完成了寫(xiě)作任務(wù)。但：形式多于內(nèi)容，套話很多，言之無(wú)物，體現(xiàn)思維深度的內(nèi)容不夠；沒(méi)有點(diǎn)題，沒(méi)有升華第二檔(15-17分)完全完成了試題規(guī)定的任務(wù)。覆蓋所有內(nèi)容要點(diǎn)。運(yùn)用的句式和詞匯能滿足任務(wù)的要求。語(yǔ)法和用詞基本準(zhǔn)確，少許錯(cuò)誤主要是為盡可能表達(dá)豐富內(nèi)容所

24、致。使用簡(jiǎn)單的語(yǔ)句間的連接成分，所寫(xiě)內(nèi)容連貫。達(dá)到了預(yù)期的寫(xiě)作目的。建議給分：15評(píng)語(yǔ)：邏輯不夠嚴(yán)謹(jǐn)，背誦痕跡明顯（但正確使用了）圖三：推斷是學(xué)生巧妙合理使用背誦的句型。建議給分：16建議給分：17第一檔（18-20分）完全完成了試題規(guī)定的任務(wù)。覆蓋所有內(nèi)容要點(diǎn)。運(yùn)用了多樣的句式和豐富的詞匯。語(yǔ)法結(jié)構(gòu)或詞匯方面有些許錯(cuò)誤，但為盡力使用較復(fù)雜結(jié)構(gòu)或較高級(jí)詞匯所致；體現(xiàn)了較強(qiáng)的語(yǔ)言運(yùn)用能力。有效地使用了語(yǔ)句間的連接成分，使全文內(nèi)容連貫、結(jié)構(gòu)緊湊。完全達(dá)到了預(yù)期的寫(xiě)作目的。建議給分：18評(píng)語(yǔ)：建議給分：19思維：臨場(chǎng)生成的內(nèi)容，升華不落俗套； The past week was by no mean

25、s ordinary, for I had finally decided on my major. This Monday, the topic was brought up again by my parents during dinner. I had asked myself the same question many times, but still couldnt make up my mind. Seeing my hesitant look, mom patted me on my shoulder, her smile encouraging me to do more r

26、esearch. Later that evening, I turned to the Internet for help. Faced with so many choices, I seemed to be lost. Law could be a good choice. Business and computer science were also attracting topstudents. I noted down one after another major, but crossed them all off, for what I wanted was a profession that could make a difference in peoples lives. The inspiration came unexpectedly with the CCTV News yesterday. The moment “Role Models of Our Time” appeared on the screen, I was awed. The news story focused on superheroes wi