1、中西方婚禮文化對比the contrast between chinese wedding and western weddingcontentsabstract.1 key words.1i. introduction.1ii. dating.22.1 dressing.3iii. courtship.3iv. engagement.44.1 engagement party.44.2 engagement ring54.3 girls reception and bridal shower6v. wedding.75.1 wedding time.75.2 wedding forms.75

2、.3 wedding invitation.85.4 tools for picking up bride.85.5 bridal dressing.95.6 wedding attendants.105.7 who hosts the wedding ceremony and reception.10vi. wedding ceremony and reception.11vii. post-wedding.13viii. wedding anniversaries.14ix. conclusion .14references14摘要：隨著中國改革開放的實施，西方的各種事物也逐漸進入中國，其

3、中很多被中國人所接受。婚禮儀式作為諸多外來文化的一部分，強烈地影響著中國人,尤其是年輕一代。同時，傳統的具有中國特色的婚禮儀式也是具有強大的感染力，許多外國人不遠千里，遠渡重洋，來到中國體驗地地道道的傳統中國婚禮。本文重要描述了當前婚禮的全過程（約會、提親、 提親、訂婚、婚禮、婚宴和婚后等方面）；通過對中西方國家婚禮的程序和儀式進行對比、分析,從而得出兩種文化的差異性和共同點,以促使兩種文化更為廣泛地交流與傳播。關鍵詞：約會；提親；訂婚；婚禮；婚宴abstract: with the reforming and opening of china, many kinds of western m

4、atters enter china gradually，and chinese people accepted most of them. wedding ceremony, as a part of varied foreign cultures, influences chinese people (especially younger generation) dramatically. at the same time, traditional chinese wedding ceremony, with its outstanding characters and great cha

5、rming, attracts a lot of foreigners, who come to china and experience the chinese wedding ceremony. the paper describes the whole process of contemporary wedding (dating, proposal, engagement, wedding ceremony, wedding reception, post-wedding and other aspects), it concludes the differences and simi

6、larities of process and ceremony of chinese and western wedding through contrast and analysis so as to promote the exchanging and transmition of chinese and western culture.key words: dating; proposal; engagement; wedding ceremony; wedding receptioni. introduction as everyone knows, love, beyond the

7、 limitation of nations, ethics, times and space, is an eternal topic for human beings. it plays an important and essential role in our social development and human civilization. sometimes, to our surprise, it can give us magical power to conquer the difficulties that we meet in our daily life. howev

8、er, love can just proves that the two lovers know and understand the relationship very well, and others cannot understand it. wedding has an especial function which can help you realize your long-cherished will, it states to others that the two lovers combine and live together forever. with chinese

9、reforming, opening and developing, chinese traditional culture steps out of china and enters western countries, then the wedding ceremony becomes a part of their culture gradually, even more and more people rooted in the western countries favor chinese traditional wedding. some people stage the wedd

10、ing ceremony on their own soil or in china adopting chinese traditional wedding ceremony, they treat it as an honor for them. at the same time, chinese people accept the western elite, useful and healthy culture and use it in their life. church wedding is a kind of western culture, the church is use

11、d for sermonizing and worshipping in western christianized countries. although chinese people does not believe in jesus christ, with the peoples thought civilizing and changing, many people believe in christ and build church in their activity centers used for praying and staging wedding ceremony, es

12、pecially in larger and developed cities in china. the young group intends to enjoy the western wedding atmosphere. ethic culture experiences thousands years developing and passing on. it symbolizes a people with their outstanding ethic character, chinese wedding has its own character, and so do west

13、ern countries. i briefly summarize the differences and similarities between two different kinds of culture through contrast and analysis and remind the younger generation not to forget our traditional culture. ii. datinggenerally speaking, dating, as the first step of marriage, should be carried out

14、 at the very beginning of the whole wedding process. but the wedding did not begin with the dating in ancient china instead of the proposal. when it is time for boy and girl to get married, boys parents should propose to girl firstly. after proposal, if the boy and the girl agreed with and satisfied

15、 with the event, so, they started to date. generally, the boy invited the girl to see the ancient performances such as acrobatics shown on the street or public places, or the lantern festival performed at night. in a word, the place where they went to date was not many comparing to nowadays. during

16、this period, they could learn of each other and cultivate the feelings between them, if they stayed together smoothly and happily, they would move to the next step. however, with the social development and the younger generations mind civilizing, they begin to date with their ideal match in the thea

17、tres, movies and quiet restaurants by themselves and cancel their parents interference. often boys invite girls out to see the movies with popcorn and inexpensive junk food and they enjoy the love stories and funny plots, this atmosphere can stimulate their beautiful minds, after movies, they often

18、choose a quiet and small restaurant filled with the beautiful love songs or sweet melody of the piano to have supper, which depends on the boys taste. after supper, the boy always pays the fee. often, they date in the evening but not in the early morning, after dating, the boy should take the girl b

19、ack home and say good night. however, in the western countries, what is the significance of american dating? often dating means no more than getting to know one another and having some fun. it is often the beginning of a friendship with someone whom you may like but not necessary marry. dating is no

20、t as serious in america as it is in some countries, but it is important because every person has the freedom to choose his marriage partner, one with whom he hopes to spend the rest of his life. dating is one way to accomplish that goal. perhaps, the democracy in the west develops dramatically, for

21、the dating, on the first dating, some american women prefer to go “dutch treat”. this means that the girl pays for herself. because americans are informal in their dating pattern, there is no rule that says boys always pay. maybe some of you do not agree with this, but some americans prefer it. in m

22、ost foreign countries, the boy usually pays all expenses when he takes a girl out, even on the first date. the girl never pays unless it is a special occasion. then the girl may insist on paying, but only if they have gone out together for quite a while. 2.1 dressingbefore dating, the boy wears the

23、suit orderly and polished shoes and combs his hair lengthily. for girl, she dresses her up carefully as well, the choice of clothes and shoes, blouse or trousers and perfume. in western countries, the boy dresses like a chinese more or less, but a remarkable difference there is the boy wearing deodo

24、rant and an after-shave lotion or perfume at all time. the media-conditioned americans prefer to scents of cosmetic products to the natural smell of body. yet it has been scientifically proven that the smell of sweat of a clean body can attract the opposite sex. many americans, however, feel the nee

25、d to cover up natural smells created by the section of glands during physical activity with artificial perfumes or colognes. iii. courtshipwhile the dating carries on smoothly and successfully, the boy thinks it is time to say “ i have fallen in love with you passionately and hopelessly as i met you

26、 at first sight, are you willing to accept my love to you and marry me” the courtship proposed suddenly while the girl has no consciousness and preparation in her mind, it can surprise the girl and be full of romance, it is proposed, perhaps, in an uncertain dating, or an out traveling or some occas

27、ions. in a word, it is not proposed until the chance is ripen. in western countries, the boy and a girl who date each other spend a lot of time together learning to know each other, when they begin to date frequently and seriously, they enter into the stage of courtship. usually, boy first proposes

28、to the girl, and often he tries to surprise the girl in a romantic way, during the ceremony of courtship, the boy kneels down one leg and swear formally and seriously, if the girl agree with his courtship, the boy gives her fiance a diamond ring as a symbol of their engagement, they may engaged for

29、weeks, months and even more years before they get married.iv. engagementafter the courtship, the boy and the girl tell their parents the event individually. so both set of parents exchange family credentials as token of intention. then, after exchange after extensive bargaining, the two families wou

30、ld arrive at the amount of money and goods that would make up the gift to the girls family. after presenting engagement tokens, the go-between would ask the brides family to chose among several auspicious dates suggested by the boys family and also set a date for presenting betrothal gifts. it is tr

31、aditional chinese ceremony. in modern times, in some rural and remote areas, the boys family still gives money only to the girls except tea, bridal cakes, pairs of male and female poultry and sugar, wine and tobacco. it is chinese character, but in some developed and high-civilized areas, the boys d

32、o not pay girls one coin. in western countries, the boys never paid the girls a lot, but the boy must face his father-in-law with serials of questions. even if a young girl has supported herself and lived away from home, her parents have the right to know just how her fianc proposes to handle the lo

33、ng-rang financing of their family and home. the fianc should state his income, his savings, and his future expectations without exaggerating any of them.4.1 engagement partyin china, engagement party is staged in boys family, the boy would invite his relatives and close friends to participate, the p

34、arty is not grandeur just about fifty to a hundred guests from the girl side less and boy more. during the party, the girl should toast the guests from boy side under the guidance of the boy and the person who is familiar with these relatives and friends, the person and the boy introduce the relativ

35、es and friends to the girl, and the girl calls the respected names following the boy, the respected relatives can give the girl money, and girl should thank them and toast more than one cup, and a pointed person should declare this affair to the public loudly. if the house is not large enough, the n

36、ot-very-important-guests have to seat in the courtyard. generally, the toast should begin from guests who seat on the salt in the house to the ordinary guests, from female guest to male guest, from guest to serviceman, last but not least, the girl can receive much money. after dinner, the acquitted

37、guests get together and chat till it is time for the girls party leaving, so all the people belonging to boys side should farewell girls party. in the west, engagement parties are given by the parents of the bride-to-be or by relative of the bride acting for her parents, usually just before the news

38、paper announcement of engagement. if the bride-to-be and her finance live in a city other than he parents home town during the wedding festivals. however if family home is not far away, it is proper for the engaged couple to travel there for the announcement party, champagne served for toasts for th

39、e engaged couples. when the party is essentially a family reunion dinner, the father of the young woman can rise and say, this is such a happy occasion for my wife and me. we wish to announce the engagement of our daughter, jenny, to the nicest young man in the entire generation, mr. edward. if a mi

40、nister, a priest, or a rabbi is present, he will rise next to bless the couple. if the party is fair larger, the engaged couple and girls parents might form a receiving line. the bride-to-be usually wears her engagement ring officially for the first time on this occasion. if she has a gift for the g

41、room-to-be, she gives it to him right before or after engagement party.4.2 engagement ringin ancient china and rural areas, the girl can not gain the engagement ring instead of a pair of golden bracelet or a couple of silver earrings given by her mother-in-law. traditionally, the golden bracelets an

42、d silver earrings are inherited from her mother-in-laws mother-in-laws mother-in-law. in the future, if they have a daughter-in-law, she will give it to her till it is lost or destroyed suddenly, the girl should treasure and cherish it very much. in western countries, for american, the traditional e

43、ngagement ring is a diamond solitaire. however, today anything goes a ring with many colored stone, a ring with a large semiprecious stone, a heirloom ring reset in a modern design, or even a stone in the brides family, simply reset in a tiffany setting. the wedding ring will be of the same metal (p

44、latinum, yellow gold, or white gold) as the engagement ring. some women prefer no engagement ring but choose a wedding band instead. no one has to have an engagement ring. a girl may want her fianc to give her a pearl necklace instead, or a jeweled watch. jeweled ring can be given as gifts on many o

45、ccasions during their married lives-such as wedding anniversaries, the birth of a child, or an important job promotion.4.3 girls reception and bridal showerin china, the day before wedding ceremony staged in grooms family next day, the brides parents should held an etiquette which states that their

46、daughter is going to marry. in this day, brides family should invite a lot of relatives and friends to come to their house and congratulate with gifts. bride parents should display the dowry to everyone, the relatives and friends, especially female, focus on it and evaluate it. generally, if the bri

47、de is born in a high-heeled family, so her parents will give hers more, oppositely, she will receive less. on the other hand, the groom should go to the brides house with certain gifts. on the etiquette, the groom should toast to these relatives and friends and call their respected names under the g

48、uide of a certain person who is familiar with these relatives and friends, there is an obscure customs that the groom should drink all the wine handed by these relatives and friends, the groom may be drunk for his inferior drinking capacity. at the same time, brides relatives and friends can value t

49、he groom figure, appearance, behaviors and judge the grooms fate based on astrology and superstition. at last, after the etiquette finished, the boy should go back. the groom can also learn of relatives and friends through this way. this ceremony is just equal to the western bridal shower, in wester

50、n countries, the bridal shower is generally considered to be a survivor of the dowry system. as an old man either tells the oft-repeated tale, centuries ago a young dutch miller fell in love with a girl who returned his affections, and all might have been well had he not been as generous as he was s

51、mitten. in the habit of donating his bread to the needy, he had become poor himself; so the girls father blocked the wedding by withholding her dowry, and urged her to marry a rich farmer. the local townspeople, hearing of the couples plight, showered the daughter with so many household goods that s

52、he soon had a much larger dowry than her father himself had provided. the two were promptly betrothed. apocryphal or not, the story indicates the communal and spontaneous nature of the bridal shower. typically showers are given by and for close friends of the bride, and the shower gifts that etiquet

53、te recommends are conventionally of the domestic variety. in fact, invitations often specify linen shower or kitchen shower, also, shower gifts are supposed to be relatively inexpensive that is, in comparison with wedding gifts.v. wedding5.1 wedding timein china, usually the wedding is staged on the

54、 holiday, such as valentines day (february, 14th). it is a romantic festival originated from the western country. with peoples thought civilizing and changing, the young generation care for it so much, during this day, some young lovers express their love to each other, date or propose, the boy send

55、s the girl rose and the girl responses the excellent chocolate in return. so a lot of young lover choose this day as their “big day” in metropolitans especially. labor day (may, 1st) and national day as the national holiday in chinese, the people working in different fields are on holiday, the bride

56、 and groom are not will to disturb others working time, so they choose labor day and national day as their wedding day popularly in big cities. in countryside, the young lovers set a luck day before the spring festival and choose an even day like twenty2nd and twenty 4th based on horoscope and super

57、stition. because the young lovers can come back, during these days, people in countryside are free, wedding can bring them happy atmosphere and surprising. but other days can also be choose as their “big day” according to astrological calendar. in western countries, the young lovers like china set the valentines day (february, 1st) as their “good day” as well. what is more, the preference for wedding in june may derive from an instinctive human urge that corresponds to the spring rut of animals. the trouble with this darwin logic is that even supporting that ea