海綿寶寶第五季英文字幕

目錄

Season5

81FriendorFoe?

82TheOriginalFryCook

NightLight

83RiseandShine

Waiting

FungusAmongUs

84SpyBuddies

BoatSmarts

GoodOFWhatshisname

85NewDigs

KrabsalaMode

86RollerCowards

BucketSweetBucket

87ToLoveAPatty

BreathOfFreshSquidward

88MoneyTalks

SpongeBobvs.PattyGadget

SlimyDancing

89TheKrustySponge

SingaSongofPatrick

90AFleainHerDome

TheDonutofShame

TheKrustyPlate

91GooGooGas

LeBigSwitch

92AtlantisSquarePantis

93PictureDay

PatNoPay

Blackjack

94BlackenedSponge

MermaidManvs.SpongeBob

95TheInmatesofSummer

ToSaveaSquirrel

96PestoftheWest

9720,000PattiesUndertheSea

TheBattleofBikiniBottom

98WhatEverHappenedtoSpongeBob?

99TheTwoFacesofSquidward

SpongeHenge

100BannedinBikiniBottomStanleyS.SquarePants

81*FriendorFoe?*

Dialogue

(attheKrustyKrab)

Mr.Kiabs:Hmmm,somethingain'tright,(abirthdaycakeonacartroilsin.Theicingreads

"HappyBirthdayKrabs")Forme?

Squidward:Don'tyoufindthisatadsuspicious?

Mr.Krabs:Suspiciondoesn'tholdacandletobirthdaywishing,(abouttoblowoutthecandle

whenPlanktonpopsoutfromunderneaththecandle)

Plankton:Surprise!(takesoutthecandleandreleasestheballoons.Theballoonspopandconfetti

goeseverywhere.Thelightfromthepoppingblindsthecustomers.Plankton'scartengagesinits

jetpackandlaunchesitselfintothekitchen.Planktonreleasesthebottompartofthecakeontothe

safeinthekitchen.ThecakeexplodesandPlanktontakestheformulaandfliesoutofthekitchen)

Mr.Krabs:Mesecretformula!

Plankton:HappyBirthdayKrabs!

SpongeBob:Don'tforgetyourcondiments,Plankton,(squirtsPlanktonwithketchup&mustard)

Mr.Krabs:Attaboy,SpongeBob!(turnstheceilingfanon.Plankton'smachinebouncesoffofit

andbreaksonthefloor.SpongeBobsnatchesthesecretformulawithhistongueandswallowsit)

SpongeBob:Safe.

Plankton:You'llruethedaywewereborn,Krabs.Illbeback,(getshisjetpackoutbutitsupside

downsohefliesintothefloor)Oh,barnacles,(everyoneisgroaningandmoaning)

SpongeBob:Why,MrKrabs?Whydoeshehateusso?

Mr.Krabs:Youmightaswellblameme,SpongeBob.(sitsonabarrelseat)Therewasatimewhen

PlanktonandIwerebestfriends,(everyonegaspsandrunsuptohearthestory)

SpongeBob:Bestfriends?

Mr.Krabs:Friendsatbirth,youmightsay.Evenasweeones,(flashbacktoKrabsandPlanktonas

babies)

Plankton:Goo!(KrabslaughsthenputsPlanktononhiscribmobile.Everyoneaw's.Cutto

birthdaycakereading“BigBoys".KrabssticksouthistonguetogetPlanktontoblowoutthe

candles)

Mr.Krabs:Thingswereallpeachesandcreams.(Planktonblowsoutthecandlesthenjumpsinthe

cake.Cuttoelementaryschool)Untilwehitgradeschool.Hey,Planky,whatchadoing?

Plankton:Oh,justalittlesomethingIthoughtI'dtryout.(aspitballhitsPlanktoninthebackof

hishead.Classmateslaugh)Idiots!I'llshowyouwithscience!Thisconcoctionisgoingtoblow

everyoneaway.(muffledexplosion.Plankton'scontainerblewupalloverhistable.Classmates

laugh)

Classmate:How'sthisforascienceexperiment,Mr.Brainatron5000?(usesPlanktonasaspitball

andspitshiminKrabs*eye)

Plankton:They'llpayforthisonedayEugene!

Mr.Krabs:Darntootin'.Hey,barnaclebrains,IthinkyouowePlanktonanapology.

Classmate:You'reright,Plankton,Pmsorry.Sorryyouhavetohangoutwithragboy.(class

laughs)

Classmate#2:Yeah.Where'dyoudoyourclothesshopping?Thetrashcan?

Mr.Krabs:Twastrue.Ididgetmeclothesfromthetrash.Yousee,whenIwasgrowingup,times

weretough.Memotherhadtofashionmeclothesfromrags,(flashbacktoKrabs*mothersewing

upclothes)

MamaKrabs:Thereyougo,son.Youroutfit'sallfinished.It'sagoodthingOldManJenkinswas

kindenoughtosparehislastwashcloth.

OldManJenkins:Oops,(ripsoffMr.Krab'sclothesandusesitasaragtodryhisboat)Imisseda

spot.

Mr.Krabs:Thenoneday,asPlanktonandIwereplottingourrevenge,Imettheloveofmelife.

Whatinneptune'snameisthat?(picksupapennyofftheground)It'sthemostbeautifulthingme

eyeshaveeverseen!Whatisit?!

Plankton:It'smoney.

Mr.Krabs:Money?

Plankton:Yeah.Youcanbuythingswithit.

Mr.Krabs:Buythings?So,IspentitonagiftformebestpalPlankton.(MrKrabsbuysaballoon

forPlanktonbutwhenhegivesittoPlankton,Planktonfliesupintotheskybecauseofhisweight)

All:Wow!

SpongeBob:Gotyoursecretrecipe,Mr.Krabs.Youhavenoideathatwentthroughtogethere.

Mr.Krabs:Tvegotaprettygoodidea,yeah,(shovesitawaywithapencil)

Fish:So,ifyouguysweresuchgreatfriends,whathappened?

SpongeBob:Yeah,Mr.Krabs.Whatdidhappennext?

Squidward:Yeah.Ireallywannaknow.

Mr.Krabs:Listenup,Squidward!Becausethisiswhereitgetsjuicy.Itallstartedinaplacecalled

“StinkyBurgers1'.Itwastheonlyplacetogetaburger.KidslovedStinky's,(allthekidsare

clamoring)AndStinkylovedthekids.

Stinky:Now,whatcanIdoforyouyoung'uns?

Classmate:Uh,Mr.Stinky?I'llhaveoneStinkyBurger,please!

Fish#2:Me,too,Stinky!

Stinky:Oh,now,now,kids.There*splentyofburgersforeveryone,(allthekidscheer)

Fish#3:That'swhywelikeyousomuch,Stinky.Youalwaysdeliverthegoods.

Fish#4:WedonrtlikeStinky,werespecthim.

Stinky:Well,whichoneisit,kids?Doyoulikemeorrespectme?

Fish#3:Like!

Fish#4:Respect!

Fish#3:Like!

Fish#4:Respect!

Stinky:Ok,let'sjustmeetinthemiddleandsayyouli-spectme.(allthekidscheer)

Mr.Krabs:Excuseus!

Plankton:Valuablecustomerscomingthrough.

Fish#3:Whatarethosedorksdoinghere?

Mr.Krabs:TwoStinkyBurgers,please.

Stinky:Didyourbrainsdribbleoutalloverthesidewalkyousleptonlastnight?Ifit'sburgersyou

want,goaroundback.

All:Yeah,Stinky!

Classmate:Thanksforkeepingthenerdsout.

Classmate#2:You'rethebest,Stinky.

Stinky:Ok,that'senough,kids.Gatheraround,children.There'ssomethingIwanttotellyou.

WhatIhavetosayisveryimportant.Ifyourememberonethingfortherestofyourlife,

rememberthatwithoutyourkindpatronage,I'dbeapennilessloserlikeRagBoy.(Mr.Krabsis

knockingonthedoorinthebackofthebuilding.Stinkyopensupthedoor)Doyoutwohavekelp

forbrains?Don'tyouunderstand?Ifyoutwoyahooscomearound,you'lldriveawayallthe

normalcustomers.Fveworkedtoolongandtoohardtomakethisali-spectablebusiness.Asitis,

Icanbarelyaffordtheessentialthingsinli...(hiswatchbeeps)Isitquittingtimealready?(ripsoff

hisclothestorevealsomenicerclothesunderneath)Now,ifyou'llexcuseme,Fmofftoenjoy

someoflife*sessentials,(getsinhislimoandmovesthestackofcashoverontheseat.Ashe

closesthedooranddrivesoff,adollarfliesintoMr.Krabs'hand)

Plankton:Didyouhearthat,Krabs?Byflipperburgersforthosecretins,hewasabletogaintheir

li-spect.

Mr.Krabs:Didyouseethatfatstackofloot?Ibetifwemadeabetterburger,we'dmakeafatter

stackofloot,(cashregisterdingsasMr.Krabs*eyesturnintodollarbillsigns)Butwhohasthe

abilitytomakesuchaburger?Whohastheskill?

Plankton:Skill,schmill,Krabs,baby.Whoneedsskillwhenscienceisonyourside?We'llmake

thatburger,andwhenwedo,wewillruletheschool!(laughs)

Mr.Krabs:(cuttoMr.KrabsandPlanktonwalkingbythedump)Sowewentbacktooursecret

hideaway,thedump,toprovetothosechowderheadsthataburgercouldbesemi-edibleandeasy

toswallow.Wemadesuretokeepcarefulrecordofourprogress.(Mr.KrabsandPlanktonwork

togethertomakeaburgerandgothroughthestepsofdoingso)

Plankton:Gently.Gently,(holdsuptheburgeronaplatter)

Mr.Krabs:Wefinallyemergedthebest-lookingburgerunderthesea.WewentbacktoStinky'sto

rubourpattyinthosekid'sgreasyfaces.ButStinky'shadbeenshutdownbyorderoftheHealth

Department.Soweseizedtheopportunityandconvertedourhideoutintoarestaurant.(Mr.Krabs

andPlanktonturnedatrailerinthedumpintoarestaurant.Mr.Krabscutthe'grandopening'tape

whilePlanktonpushedabuttontosignalforcustomers.Alineofcustomerslineupinfrontofthe

restaurant)Ouradventureintocapitalismbegan.Onedollar,please,(thekidgiveshisdollarfora

burger)

Plankton:Thereyouare,sir.

Mr.Krabs:T'wasmefirstdollarIeverearned,andwasalsothestartofabeautiful,romantic

relationshipwithmoney.

Fish#5:Hey!Yourburger'sevenworsethanStinky's.Wecanbarelykeepthemdown.Andifit

weren'tforStinky'sshuttingdown,noonewouldeathere.Sogivemeaburger.Fmstarving.

Plankton:Justlookatthem,Eugene.Theverypeoplewhoridiculedmearenowfeastingonmy

recipe.

Mr.Krabs:Ithoughtitwasourrecipe.

Plankton:Tmrulingtheirstomachs.AndsoonI'llberulingtheirminds!(laughs)

Mr.Krabs:Butwhataboutsatisfyingthecustomer?

Plankton:Barnaclestothecustomer,I'mtalkingaboutrulingtheworld!(laughs)Andwiththis

secretrecipe,nothingwillstopme!

Mr.Krabs:Givemethat!

Plankton:Stop!You'regonnabustit!(therecipetearsinhalf)

Mr.Krabs:Burgersaren'tforrulingworlds!

Plankton:I'mteiTiblysorry,Eugene,Icouldnfthearyou.Couldyoucomecloser?Maybestandon

thetileinfrontofyou?

Mr.Krabs:Whichone?TheonethatsaysuEjectnortheonethatsays"TrapDoor"?

Plankton:Oh,eitheronewilldo.

Mr.Krabs:WhatIwassayingwas...(PlanktonpullsastringthatlaunchesMr.Krabsoutofthe

restaurant)You'llregretthisoneday!(Mr.Krabslandsinthetrash.Flashbacktopresent)Andhe

alwaysdid.

Plankton:(popsoutofthepeppershaker)Lies!(SpongeBobisabouttoswallowtheformulaagain

butMrKrabstakesitandputsitinhisbackpocket)

Mr.Krabs:Holdonthere,meboy.Wedon'tneedtogothroughthatagain.

Plankton:Verytouching,butcompletelyfalse.

Mr.Krabs:Donrtknowwhatyoumean.

Plankton:Whydon'tyoutellthemthetruth?

SpongeBob:Itdidhappenthatway,didn'tit,Mr.Krabs?

Plankton:Mostofit'strue,exceptforwhatreallyhappened!Wehadcreatedthetastiestburger.

That'swhenthingsbecameunsavory,(flashbackagaintorestaurant.Mr.Krabslaughs)

Mr.Krabs:First,I'llruletheirstomachsandthen...(laughs)...theirmoney!(Mr.Krabslaughs)

Plankton:Butwhataboutsatisfyingthecustomers?

Mr.Krabs:Barnaclestothecustomers!(Planktongasps)Fmtalkin'aboutcoins,cash,wallets,

bankaccounts!Andwiththissecretrecipe,nothingwillstopme!

Plankton:Gimmethat!(bothtrytotaketheformula)

Mr.Krabs:Stop,you'regonnabustit.(formulatearsinhalf)

Plankton:Thisisn'taboutmoney,Eugene.

Mr.Krabs:Malarkey.(Mr.KrabsputsPlanktoninastrawandspitshimout)

Plankton:You'llregretthisoneday!(landsinapileoftrash)Ouch,(emergesandlooksatthehalf

ofhisrecipe)Ourlittlesquabbleonlygotmepartoftherecipe.

SpongeBob:Gosh,Mr.Plankton,thatdoesn'tsoundliketheMr.Krabsstoryatall.

Karen:That'sbecauseitisn't.

SpongeBob,Mr.Ki*abs,&Plankton:Karen?!

Karen:YouYebothliars.That'snothowithappenedatall.Inthosedays,Iwasjuststartingoutas

asecuritysystem.PlanktonandImetwhenheinstalledme.

Plankton:Itwasonlyourthirddate.

Karen:Anyways,Ihadrecordedthewholethinginmydatabanks,(flashbackonKaren'scomputer

screen)

Plankton:Nowthat'sahandsomelookingburger.

Mr.Krabs:Yousaidit,oldchum,(overintercom)Attention!GetyourPlanktonandKrabspatties

righthere!(atumbleweedrollsby)Doyouthinkitwasagoodideatoopeninthedump?

(musicisplayinginthebackground)

Plankton:What'sthatmusic?

Mr.Krabs:I'dknowthatthemesonganywhere.It'sOldManJenkins.OldManJenkins!(OldMan

Jenkinsputsatireinhisboat)

OldManJenkins:IjustbeenlookingforsomenewshoesforOFBessie.

Mr.Krabs:You'vehelpmemomandmethroughsometoughtimes.Itwouldbeanhonorifyou'd

bethefirsttotryourdeliciousburgers.

OldManJenkins:Why,I'dbehappyto!(bitesintotheburgerthensmiles)

Mr.Krabs&Plankton:Yeah!(OldManJenkinsfallsover.Later,anewspaperappearsonscreen)

Mr.Krabs:"PlabPattiesK.O.OldManJ..."Ican'tbelievewepoisonedthatsweetoldguy.

Plankton:Well,heisold.

Mr.Krabs:Hey.thatguyislikefamilytome.

Plankton:Well,itwasyourfaultthepattywastainted.

Mr.Krabs:You'retheonewhoputtoomuchseaweedsauceintheburger.

Plankton:Youletitsitouttoolong.That'swhatdidit!I'mtakingtherecipeandfixingit.

Mr.Krabs:Noway,thatrecipe'smine!(bothfightovertherecipe)

Plankton:Stop,you'regonna...(recipetearsinhalf,sendingbothintooppositesidesofthe

restaurant.Planktonwalksout)Youwannafightoverthisrecipe,Hlgiveyaafightyou'llnever

forget!(slamsthedoorcausingashelf,abovetheboilingpatty,tospillthejarsintothecauldron)

Mr.Krabs:Well,that'sruined.But,nouselettingthisgotowaste.Thesekids'lleatanything,(licks

someofthepattymix)I'vedoneit.Tvediscoveredtheperfectpattybatter.

Karen:Meanwhile,Planktonwasbackattheelementaryschool.Butthistime,hewasgoingit

alone.(PlanktonputsaChumBucketbucketwithmeatinitwhileMr.Krabswheelsin"Krabby

Patties"andknockshimover)

Mr.Krabs:Oh,noyoudon't!Thisismyterf.

Plankton:Ithinknot,RagBoy.

Mr.Krabs:What?WhyIouttasquashyourightnow.Youlittle...

Plankton:Getoutofmyface!(bothgrowlateachother)

Fish#6:Hey,look!Nerdfight.

Bully:IbetfivebucksonRagBoy.

Plankton:Aha!Wellletthecustomersdecidewho'sburgerisbetter.Steprightup,gents.Geta

deliciousChumBurgerrighthere.

Classmate:BigJohnnywilleatanything.

(BigJohnnywalksovertoPlankton'sside)

Plankton:HaveaChumBurger,Johnny,sir.(Johnnyeatsit)

Karen:Planktonhadpiecedtogetherhisowncreationusingmemoryandscience.

Plankton:Goon,sir!Tellyourbuddieswhatyouthink!(BigJohnnyspitstheburgeroutonboth

hisfriends)

Classmate:TmgonnatryoneofRagBoy'sburgers.

Mr.Krabs:Hereyaare,sir.YouarethefirsttotasteaKrabbyPatty,(handshimapatty.Hetakesa

biteandinstantlyenjoysit)

Classmate:Flavor!

Fish#7:Edible!

KidFish:Wecanactuallyholditdown!

Fish#8:Thisisthemostflavortasticsensationmystill-developingtastebudshaveever

experienced!

All:Yay,RagBoy!

Plankton:Filshowyou,Krabs!I'llstealthatcursedrecipefromyouoneday,andIwon'tstoptillI

do!(flashbackends)

Mr.Krabs:Woo-hoo!Myrecipewas,is,andalwayswillbethebest.

Plankton:Youwouldn'thavethatrecipeifitweren'tforme.

Mr.Krabs:Youcallin*mealiar?

Karen:Willyoumenstopyellingateachother?Ican*tbelieveyouletareciperuinsucha

wonderfulfriendship.(bothtearup)

Mr.Krabs:Youweremyonlytruefriendthatdidn'thaveapresidentprintedonhim.Butmoney

doesn'thugback.

Plankton:Mylifehasbeennothingbutalonglineofdisappointmentssincewebecameenemies.

AlltheseyearsFvebeentryingtostealyourformula.ButIwasreallyjusttryingtostealbackour

friendship.

Mr.Krabs:Really?

Plankton:It*sallIeverreallywanted.Togetbacktothewayitusedtobe.Youandmeagainstthe

world!Howaboutahug,Krabs,oldpal?

Mr.Krabs:Tdlikethat,Planky,oldchum.(bothhugandcryatthesametime)

SpongeBob:Doesn'titjustwarmyourheart,Karen?

Karen:Isupposeitwould.IfIhadone.

Plankton:I'msorry,Krabs,oldbuddy.

Mr.Krabs:Me,too.Me,too.(PlanktongrabstheformulafromMr.Krabs*backpocket)

Plankton:Now,Karen!(Karengrabsthefonnula)Backoff,RagBoy.(jumpsontheformulaand

Karenwheelsoff)

SpongeBob:[gasplSabotage!

Plankton:Go,Karen!

[Theychaseeachotherinacircleasanotherepisodedrawstoaclose]

82*TheOriginalFryCook*

Dialogue

(AttheKrustyKrab...)

OldmanJenkins:Ijustcan'tdecidewhattoorder.

Squidward:Youalreadyordered.

OldManJenkins:Don'trushme,younglady!

Squidward:Hurryup,SpongeBob!

(Backinthekitchen,SpongeBobisfillinginaketchupheartonaKrabbyPatty.)

Squidward:Whatistakingyousolong?

SpongeBob:I'maddingthelove!

Squidward:You'renotgettingpaidtolove.

SpongeBob:Well,I'mnothereforthemoney.(Putsthetopbunonandwalksout.SpongeBob

talkstotheKrabbyPattyonhiswaytothecustomer'stable.)I'llalwaystreasurethesemoments

wehadtogether.

Squidward:Look!!!

(Hepointstooutside,whereasolidgoldlimousinepullsuptotheKrustyKrab.Everyonegasps,

thenrunsouttothelimo,knockingoverandwalkingoverSpongeBob.WhenSpongeBobliftshis

head,tohisgreatdisappointment,heseeshisburgeristrampledwithabigfootprintinthe

middle.)

SpongeBob:Awww...

(Backoutside,asecurityguardopensthelimodoorforsomeone.)

Mr.Krabs:Well,I'llbecookedinbutter!It'sJim,theOriginalFryCook!

(Outofthelimostepsabald,overweight,bluefishwearingafastfoodcap,andayellowshirt.He

walksintoTheKrustyKrab.)

Jim:Krabs!

SpongeBob:TheJim!?!Hewhoflippedpattiesinthebeforetimes?

Mr.Krabs:You'redoin'well,Jim.Isthatlimosolidgold?

Jim:Itsureis.Iwasonmywaytomysolidgoldmansionnexttomysolidgoldlake,whenI

thoughtrdtakeatripdownmemorylane.

Squidward:Goodol*Jim!Whenyouworkedhere,theplacehadclass.

SpongeBob:Yeah.Whenthisplacehadclass...(WeseeaflashbackofMr.Krabsthesameold

outfit,excepthehasabluesweaterlikehiscurrentblueshirtandamedallionthathasaonit.

Healsohassidebums,andisdancinginaKrustyKrabthatlookslikethesamefromtheoutside,

butlookslikeaballroomfromtheinsidewithwhitefloorsandpinkwallpaper.Squidwardcomes

outfromtheboatinfrontoftheorderingwindow,whichisbrownandhasapaintedwooden

mermaidonthefront.HeliftsoffhisKrustyKrabhattoreveallong,blondehairthatgoesallthe

waytohisthighs.HewalksovertoKrabs,whopointstothekitchendoor.OutcomesJim,holding

a"JimPatty",withhisnamedsignedonthesideinketchup.TheonlydifferencewithJimisthat

hehascurlybrownhairandazitbeneathhislip.WhenKrabsandSquidwardseetheJimpatty,the

clutcheachotherinamazement,thentakebasketsandskiparoundJim,sprinklingflowerpetals

onhimasheholdsuptheJimPatty.Endflashback,andthewholeKrustyKrewislaughing,

includingSpongeBob.Theystopandstareathimuntilhestopsalso.)Well,we'vehadsomegood

times,too.Right,Squidward?

Squidward:No.

(Jimwalksuptothe''EmployeeoftheMonth"wall.

Jim:Hey,that'snew."EmployeeoftheMonth",huh?

SpongeBob:That'sme!

Mr.Krabs:Don'tworry,Jim.Noonecouldeverreplaceyou.Theoriginalisstillunderneath.

(HepunchesthewallandallofSpongeBob'spicturesfallonhimandbreak.Underneathisagiant

photoofJim.)

Mr.Krabs:Your"BestEmployeeEver'*award!SpongeBob!SweepupthismesswhileJimandI

catchup.

SpongeBob:Yes,sir.

(Mr.KrabsandJimsitatatableandtalkabouttheirlives.)

Jim:AfterIleftTheKrustyKrabIworkedatsomeofthefinestrestaurantsaroundtheworld.Igot

sosuccessful,Iwasabletoretireinluxury.

SpongeBob:WouldyousignmyKrabbyPatty?

(Showshimthesmashedpattyfromearlier.)

Jim:Oh,I...Don'tsignwhatIdidn'tmake.

Mr.Krabs:Hey,bigshot!Whydon'tyoustepbehindthefryerforoldtime'ssake?

Jim:You'reon,Krabs!ButFilhavetochargeyou!

(Mr.KrabslaughshystericallywhileJimgrinsandsipshissoda.)

Mr.Krabs:Aye,youalwaysknewhowtomakemelaugh.Youjustdon'tfindemployeeslikethat

anymore.

SpongeBob:Yeah.NotunlessyoulookRIGHTINFRONTOFYOU!!!

Mr.Krabs:(Gasps)YouYeright,boy.Iappreciateyou,Squidward!

(WeseeSquidwardwalkingby,awettoiletplungerinhand.)

Squidward:NowIfeelcomplete!

Mr.Krabs:Nowhow'saboutthatpatty?

Jim:Everyone,watchandlearn!

(EveryonegathersatthekitchendoorwayasJimenters,butthedoorclosesandJim'sbodyguards

blockit.)

Bodyguard#1:NoonewatchesJim.

(Jimringsthebellandholdsoutaburgerthroughtheorderingwindow.)

Jim:Onepatty!Therightway.

Mr.Krabs:It'sathingofbeauty!

SpongeBob:What'ssogreataboutaJimPattyanyway?(Takesabiteoutofit.)Meh,it'sOK.(His

eyeswidenandheistransportedtoamysticalworld,fullofstarsandpatties.Heridesonone,but

itdisappears,andhefalls.Butsuddenlyhebecomesoneandslidesonarainbowdowninto

SpongeBob'smouthattheKrustyKrab.)Wow!Thatwas...amazing!(SpongeBobwalksuptoJim,

whoisatatableflirtingwithgirls.)Uh,Mr.Jim,sir?

Jim:Oh,hey!You...You'retheguy...whosweepsup,right?

SpongeBob:I'mthenewfrycook,sir.

Jim:Oh!Youmadethat...stepped-onthingIsawearlier,right?

SpongeBob:Doyouhaveanytipsyoucanpassontoarookie?

Jim:Besidesdon'tsteponthefood?

SpongeBob:Pleasecritiquemywork!Iwishtolearnatthefeetofthemaster!

Jim:Nowthat*sthewaytogrovel.Elldoit!(Later,weseeSpongeBobandJiminthekitchen,

training.SpongeBobhandsacompletedpattytoJim,andJimweighsit.SpongeBobisvery

excited,untilhefollowsJimintothebathroomandwatcheshimflushthepattydownthetoilet.)

Thepickleslicesweretoothick.

(SpongeBobgrillsanotherone,andflipsitintotheair,andstrugglestosomehowmakeitlevitate

untilJimsaystostop.)

Jim:Holdit...Holdit...Holdit...And...stop.

(Later,asSpongeBobisfinishedcraftingtheKrabbyPatty,Jimstepsonitandliftshisfoot,

coveredinmustard.)

Jim:Now,toomuchmustard,see?

(SpongeBobtakeshisfingerandlickssomeoff.CuttoSpongeBobmakingmorepatties,Jimtaste

testingthem,andthenflushingthem.Eventually,thetoiletgetssofull,thatitbacksup.

SpongeBobrunsoutofthestall,crying.Afishapproachingthestallseesthis.)

Fish#1:Oh,man!

SpongeBob:AmIafraud?

(Hecries,andSquidwardknocksonthedoor.)

Squidward:SpongeBob,whatareyoudoinginthere?

SpongeBob:Cryingmyeyesout.

Squidward:Well,hurryup.Igottacry,too.

SpongeBob:Why,Squidward?

Squidward:BecausewhenJimleaves,I'llbestuckwithyouagain!

SpongeBob:Don'tworry,Squidward.Jimwon'tbeleaving,He*stakingmyjob.Fmtheonewho's

leaving!

(SpongeBobburstsintotears.)

Squidward:Really?(MexicanFiestamusicstartstoplay.)Yes!Ha,cha-cha!Ha,cha-cha!Ha,

cha-cha!Whoo-hoo-hoo!Hee,hee,Ha!Ha!

(SpongeBobwalksintothebathroomandsitsonapileofwaterloggedpatties.)

SpongeBob:TheKrustyKrabdeservesbetterthanmymeagerskills.Ishouldbeprofessional.I

must...resign.(Heclickshisspatulalikeapen,andstartswritingonarolloftoiletpaper.)"Dear

Mr.Krabs,u...

(Later,hewalksoutofthebathroomtoseeacrowdtowardsthefrontoftheKrustyKrab.)

Mr.Krabs:Threecheersfortheworld'sgreatestfrycook...SpongeBob!

SpongeBob:(Gasps)Me?

Mr.Krabs:Comehere.HelpuscheerforJim.

AllButMr.KrabsandSquidward:Hip,hip,Hooray!

(SpongeBobrunsintothekitchen.)

SpongeBob:Goodbye,grill.Goodbye,pot.Goodbye,pan.Solong,fryfat.Goodbye,greasestain.

(Runsintothefreezer.)Goodbye,frozenpatty#1.Goodbye,frozenpatty#2.

Narrator:298frozenpattieslater...

SpongeBob:(Runsoutofthefreezer)Goodbye,freezer.

Mr.Krabs:SpongeBob?(SpongeBobhidesinthefreezerasNk.Krabswalksin.)SpongeBob?

(Smellssomethingintheair.)Thatsmellslikearesignationnote,(leavestheresignationnotice

underapattybunonthegrillwithaflagonthetopsaying"Mr.Krabs"onit.)SpongeBob's

resignation?Oh,thisisterrible!Noone'smakingpatties!AndthatmeanFmnotmakingmoney!

(Jimwalksin.)

Jim:Hey,Eugene,where'sthatlittlefrycookofyours?

Mr.Krabs:Hethinksyou'retakinghisjob,sohe*srunoff!

Jim:Hey,greatidea!Andyoucangivemearaise!

(Theylaughovertheirownlittlejoke,andSpongeBobwatchesfromthefreezerwindow.)

SpongeBob:Lookatthem.Mr.KrabsisprobablyofferingJimmyjobrightnow.

Mr.Krabs:Well,Ibettergofindhim.SpongeBob!

SpongeBob:Don'tworry,Mr.Krabs.Iwasjustleaving.Pmnotfittoinhabitthesamekitchenas

Jim.SoitiswithaheavyheartthatIrelinquishmypositionasfrycook.

Jim:Whatareyouthinking,SpongeBob?Tmnottakingyourjob.

SpongeBob:Butyou'rethegreatestfrycookintheworld!TheKrustyKrabdeservesbetterthan

me.

Jim:Boththosestatementsaretrue,SpongeBob,butthere'sareasonIlefttheKrustyKrab.Itall

startedonawarmsummerevening.Businesswasslow,soSquidwardandIwerehavingoneof

ourfamousbullsessions.(FlashbacktoJimandSquidward,bothwithhair,talkingattheKrusty

Krab.)WeshouldopenourownrestaurantandstopliningOldManK'spockets.

Squidward:No,thanks.I'mjustdoingthisuntilmyclarinetcareertakesoff.

Jim:Whatifitneverdoes?Don'tyouwannahavesomethingtofallbackon?

Squidward:Yeah!Ha!Icouldlosemybeautiful,flowinghair,too,butI'mnotbuyingawigyet.

(Hishairdisintegratesandfallsoutofhisheadinstantly.)

Jim:Well,whileyougowigshopping,I'mgonnagotalktoMr.Krabs.(WalksintoMr.Krabs's

office.)Hey,Mr.Krabs,yougottasecond?

Mr.Krabs:Anythingforyou,Jimmy,meboy.Copasquatandlayyourwreckandtellmewhat's

onyourwig,Jim.

Jim:Cutthegas,Krabs,anddigthis:I'vebeenbustinrmyconkforyou.Youbetterlayonsome

extragravy,orFmgoingtoagitatethegravel.

Mr.Krabs:Whatnow?

Jim:Youknow,layapatch.

Mr.Krabs:'Scuseme?

Jim:Givemearaise,orI'mquitting.

Mr.Krabs:Araise?That'snotinmynHiptionaryu.Helpmegetwithit,Jack.

Jim:Stoptalkinglikethat.

Mr.Krabs:Thesesideburnsaren'treal.

(Mr.Krabsripsthemoff.)

Jim:Ineedmoremoneyinmypaycheckattheendofeveryweek,capiche?

(Mr.Krabsstartslaughinguncontrollably.Whenhedoesn'tstop,Jimleaves,notstoppingtolisten

toSquidward'scomplaintsabouthishair.Endflashback,andwearebacktothemodernday

KrustyKrab,whereKrabsisstilllaughing.)

Mr.Krabs:Aye,it'sstillasfunnytodayasitwasthen.

(WeseeSquidwardcryingoverhisbaldhead.)

Mr.Krabs:Yousee,SpongeBob,you*vegotonequalityJimwillneverhave:you'recheap!

SpongeBob:Wow!Ineverthoughtaboutitthatway!

Mr.Krabs:So,youllstay?

SpongeBob:Aye,aye,Mr.Krabs.

Jim:Well,Eugene,lookslikeyou'vegotyourselfanothersucker.The