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模板22讀后續(xù)寫之結尾模板
?本節(jié)導航——??
鶴,題型解讀真題分析+關鍵詞+命題預測/技巧解讀
朗?模板構建答題模板+技巧點撥
模板01主旨升華句|模板02精彩結尾句
逋?模板運用真題示例+思路點撥+規(guī)范答題+舉一反三
話?模板演練最新模擬、預測考向
侈強蟹篌
年份卷別話題
2024新高考I&II卷誠信回報陌生司機相助
浙江卷1月卷突破自我腦圖定位找目標
2023新高考I&II卷在老師的鼓勵下參加作文比賽
浙江卷1月卷“我”與蜂鳥的神奇邂逅
2022新高考I&II卷鼓勵身殘志堅男孩繼續(xù)參加越野賽
浙江卷6月卷為無家可歸的人們發(fā)放食物
浙江卷1月卷與“最不合拍”搭檔成為好友
題型真題示例
【新高考I&II卷】Paragraph1:
IranbacktoGunterandtoldhimthebad
讀后續(xù)寫news.__________________________________________
Paragraph2:
Fourdayslater,whenIwasbackinVienna,IcalledGunteraspromised.___________________
讀后續(xù)寫的語篇類型一般是記敘文,或敘議結合。故事通過設置較為真實的問題情境,考查考生
考點揭秘能否運用英語基礎知識準確理解文章故事情節(jié),并結合所給文本材料及兩個段落首句,分析篇
章結構、情節(jié)脈絡,發(fā)揮其獨立思考能力,展開合理想象。運用英語詞匯、語法等基礎寫作知
識技能,完成一篇與給定材料有邏輯銜接、情節(jié)和結構完整的短文。讀后續(xù)寫題型創(chuàng)造性地將
“閱讀,,與“寫作,,深度結合,能夠更加有效地考查考生的綜合語言運用能力、思維能力、學習能
力和書面表達能力。反映考生在面對生活實踐或學習探索問題情境時,能否在正確的思想價值
觀念指導下合理運用思維方法,有效整合英語語言學科知識,具備高質量地認識問題、分析問
題和解決間題的綜合素質。這個新題型能較全面容觀地反映高考評價體系中“四層”的考查內容
和“四翼”的考查要求。
從選材上來看,語篇選材情節(jié)曲折,邏輯性強。讀后續(xù)寫所提供的語篇材料一般是具有正能量
而且故事性比較強的文章。一般來說,文章內容通俗易懂,故事線素的邏輯性較強,寫作要求
續(xù)寫的部分多是故事的高潮或結局。例如2022年全國新高考I卷的讀后續(xù)寫,所給文章講述
了作者在一次越野賽跑前發(fā)現(xiàn)學生David打算放棄比賽。續(xù)寫部分內容大致為了解清楚原因之
后,在作者的鼓動下,David勇敢地參加了比賽。
從語言特點上來看,讀后續(xù)寫原材料一般是記敘文,或夾敘夾議類體裁,敘述性語言和描寫性
語言相結合。語言生動、細膩、富有感情,簡潔樸素,畫面感強。因此,考生在續(xù)寫過程中,
應該體會原材料故事中的語言特點,繼而完成語言風格契合度高的短文。
(一)把握故事主題
續(xù)寫故事應符合積極的世界觀和價值觀取向,邏輯合理,情節(jié)連費。要閱讀語篇,從人與自我、
人與社會、人與自然三個主題語境進行分析,把握故事主題,防止主題跑偏和故事情節(jié)離奇荒
誕。
(二)學會分析情節(jié)
分析故事情節(jié)一般從故事六要素著手,即who,when,where,what,why,howo然后理順故事情
節(jié)發(fā)展線和主人公的情感變化線。這樣,故事的人物、事件和主要人物的心理變化就會一目了
然,為接下來的續(xù)寫做好準備。
技巧解讀(三)構思續(xù)寫情節(jié)
1.分析段首句,根據(jù)段首句的關鍵信息,提出問題,預設故事情節(jié)發(fā)展走向。
2.關注段首句和續(xù)寫部分的銜接,思考續(xù)寫第一段和第二段的銜接,思考故事如何結尾,如何
與前文做好首尾呼應,邏輯性應強,體現(xiàn)故事主題。
(四)優(yōu)化語言表達
1.教學過程中,教師應該重視故事閱讀,重視優(yōu)質文本材料的開發(fā)和解讀,引導學生積累有效
的語言素材。
2.語言提升可以從場景描寫、人物動作描寫、情感情緒描寫、人物心理活動描寫、神態(tài)肖像刻
畫等方面分類整理,進行微情境訓練,提升語言表達的質量。
◎根磔)建
【模板01精彩主旨升華句】
一、成長突破
1.Thecrackedballetshoes,ribbonsfrayedlikewoundedwings,whisperedatruth:trueflightbeginswhenwestop
countingthefalls.
(舞鞋破損一失敗與成長)
2.Histremblingfingersfinallyreleasedthecrumpledspeechdraft,settingfreenotjustpaper,butthecripplingfear
ofimperfection.
(揉皺的演講稿一克服完美主義)
3.Sweatblurredtheequationsonthechalkboard,transformingthemintohieroglyphsofperseveranceonlythe
bravecoulddecipher.
(黑板汗?jié)n一堅持的意義)
4.Themarathonmedalleftanicyimprintonherchest-awintersunmeltingthefrostofself-doubt.
(獎牌冰涼觸感一自信覺醒)
二、親情溫度
1.Grandpa'spocketwatch,itscrackedglasscloudedwithage,tickedlouderthanwords:loveoutlivestimeitself.
(懷表裂痕一永恒親情)
2.Mom*sapronpockets,perpetuallystuffedwithband-aidsandcandy,becamelivingproofthatsuperheroeswear
floralprints.(圍裙口袋一母愛偉大)
3.Thehalf-carvedwoodenduck,abandonedontheworkbench,grewtruerwingsinDad*sunfinishedlovethanany
finishedcraft.(未完成木雕一父愛無言)
三、勇氣力量
1.Thewheelchair'schromerimscaughtsunsetfire,forgingwheelsofphoenixrisingfromashesofdespair.
(輪椅反光一逆境重生)
2.Herstutteringshadowonthedebatestagestretchedtallerwitheachdeepbreath,paintingcourageinsilhouettes.
(影子變化-自我超越)
3.Therescuedog'schewedleash,teethmarksscoringleather,becamebattlescarsoftrustreclaimed.
(狗繩牙印一治愈創(chuàng)傷)
四、自然哲思
1.Mapleseedshelicopteringdownwardtaughthertheparadox:sometimessurrenderisthebravestformofflight.
(楓樹種子飄落一生命哲理)
2.Tadpoleswrigglinginthejarcastmoonlithieroglyphsonherwall-livingproofthatmagicthrivesinordinary
containers.(蝌蚪游動一平凡中的奇跡)
3.Thesnappedsaplingbenttowardsunlight,itsscartissueformingawisersmilethanstraighttrunksevercould.
(斷樹向陽T創(chuàng)傷與成長)
五、友情微光
1.Sharedearbudsdanglingbetweendeskswoveinvisiblethreads,provingfriendshipneedsnogranddeclarations.
(共用耳機-默契友情)
2.Herdoodle-coveredcastbecameacanvasofsolidarity,eachmarkerstrokeasilent2'mhere".
(石膏涂鴉一陪伴力量)
3.Thehalf-meltedcrayonsintheirsecretboxblendedcolorsbeyondrainbow-theexacthueofchildhoodpromises
kept.
(融化蠟筆一純真約定)
六、文化傳承
1.Great-grandma'sembroideryhoopheldcaptivestarlight,eachstitchaconstellationoffadingtraditions
demandingresurrection.(刺繡繃架一文化延續(xù))
2.Thecrackedclanledger'stea-stainedpagesbreathedancestralsighs,turninggenealogyintolivingpoetry.
(族譜茶漬一家族記憶)
4.Grandpa'sdentedharmonica,rustedbutresonant,playedtunesthatrebuiltbombedcitiesnotebynote.
(口琴銹跡T歷史回響)
七、自我和解
1.Frecklesreflectedinthepondmultipliedintostarmaps-shefinallysawcelestialbeautyinearthlyimperfections.
(水中雀斑T外貌接納)
2.Theabandonedpiano*sdustykeysbloomedunderhesitantfingers,composingredemptionsonatasinminor
scales.
(鋼琴積灰T重拾初心)
3.Razor-scarredwristsnowborehennavines,paintransformedintogardenswherehopetookroot.
(紋身遮蓋傷疤—自我療愈)
八、生命頓悟
1.ICUmonitors'greenwavesmirroredthewillowoutside,bothwhispering:fragilityisjustintensityindisguise.
(心電圖與柳樹一生命真諦)
2.Grandma'slastknittingneedlestillheldunraveledyarn-notunfinishedbusiness,butlife*sinsistenceon
open-endedmiracles.
(未完成毛線一生死哲思)
3.ThehospicebutterflyperchedonherIVpole,itsbriefvisitrewritingendingsaswingedbeginnings.
(蝴蝶停留醫(yī)療設備T生命輪回)
九、社會關懷
1.Thehomelessman'slibrarycard,wornsmootherthancoins,provedpovertycan'tcensorhungryminds.
(破損借書證一精神尊嚴)
2.Protestplacardsabandonedinrainbledcolorsintogutters-paintbecomingtheveinsofchange.
(褪色標語牌―社會變革)
3.Braillemenusatthecafefolded/unfoldedlikeorigamiswans,givingflighttoinclusion.
(盲文菜單折痕一平等包容)
十、平凡光輝
1.Thejanitor'skeychain,heavywithclassroomghosts,unlockedmorewisdomthananytextbook.
(鑰匙串聲響一平凡偉大)
2.Fadedlunchboxstickerschronicledamigrantworker*sjourney-eachcartooncharacteramilemarkerof
resilience.
(飯盒貼紙T奮斗歷程)
3.Thebusdriver'srain-streakedwindshieldframedathousandlifestories,eachdropaliquidchapter.
(車窗雨痕一>人間百態(tài))
【模板02高分結尾句】
精彩結尾01:畫面定格一一人物動作的畫面定格
01
Theystoodthereforamoment,sidebyside,waitingfortherushingholidaycurrentandfortheirplaceinit.Then
thedaughterglancedoverandmomentarilyregardedhermother.Andslowly,almostreluctantly,sheplacedherarm
withapparentlyunaccustomedaffectionaroundhermother'sshouldersandgentlyguidedherbackintothedeluge.
她們并肩站在那里,等待著節(jié)日的浪潮,等待著她們在浪潮中的位置。然后女兒掃了一眼,立刻注視著她
的母親。慢慢地,幾乎是不情愿地,帶著明顯不習慣的愛她把胳膊放在她母親的肩膀上,輕輕地引導她回
到洪水中。
02
Hishardworkpaidoff!Holdingthesodatinfirmly,Reubenrushedfortheshoptobuythebrooch.Themomenthe
gotthebeautifulbrooch,heburstthroughthefrontdoorandplaceditinDora'shand.NeverhadDorareceived
suchagift.Speechlessandhappy,sheheldhersontightlyintoherarms,withtearswellingupinhereyes.
他的努力得到了回報!魯本緊緊地握著汽水罐,沖向商店去買胸針。他一拿到那枚漂亮的胸針,就沖進前
門,把它放在朵拉的手里。多拉從來沒有收到過這樣的禮物。她高興得說不出話來,緊緊地把兒子抱在懷
里,眼淚涌了出來。
03
Thebutterflycleanedhertearsontheface,"No."Godfeltabitrelievedandsaid,"Tomorrowyoucanbecome
humanagain."Butsheshookherheadandsaid,"No,Iwanttobeabutterflyfortherestofmylifb...”Thenthe
butterflywouldstaytogetherwithherloverforever.Onthetopofthemountain,sheseemedtoenjoythesunrise
andthesunsethappilywiththem.
蝴蝶擦干了臉上的眼淚,說,“不。”上帝松了一口氣,說。“明天你就可以變回人類了。”但她搖了搖頭說,
“不,我想做一輩子蝴蝶…”然后蝴蝶就會永遠和她的愛人在一起。在山頂上,她似乎和他們一起快樂地享受
著日出和日落。
讀后續(xù)寫精彩結尾02:畫面定格——特殊寓意的寫景畫面
01
Theskywasabillionpureeyesoflightandthegrassgreenunderfoot,itwasasifnightanddayhadbecomeone
beautifulmoment.Dawnhadcome.
天空像是十億只純凈的眼睛拼接在一起,腳下是青草,仿佛黑夜和白晝已成為一個美麗的時刻。黎明已經
來臨。(黎明到來的畫面)
02
Dawnsentshimmeringraysovertheplacidocean,bestowingagoldenpathfromtheshoretothehorizon.
黎明在平靜的海面上放射出出閃閃發(fā)亮的光線,留下一條從海岸到地平線橫亙而過的金色道路。(黎明到
來的畫面)
03
ThecrystalandceruleanwaterwasgentleasIwadedthroughit,thesunsetlikeorangepaintonabluecanvas.
當我涉過水晶般天藍色的輕柔的水時,日落就像藍色畫布上的橙色顏料。(美好日落時的畫面)
04
Thelingeringsunlightwasobliteratedbytherapidlyfallingnight,resemblingapitch-blackcurtaindrapedoverthe
sky.
逗留在天際的最后一縷陽光被迅速落下的夜幕擦除,就像是天空被一層漆黑的幕布覆蓋。(日落時的畫面)
05
Themoonundersiegebystarsseemedtolightenthenightbringingforthstarsthatshoneandhungintheblackness.
Theneverendingblacknessconsumedeverything.
被群星圍困的月亮似乎照亮了黑夜,帶來了在黑暗中閃耀和懸掛著的群星。無盡的黑暗吞噬了一切。(描
寫夜空的畫面)
06
Lookingup,IsawthesunshinebrighterthanIeverknewbefore.Isawatreeinthedistanceglistengentlyasit
reflectedthesun'srays.Myconsciousnessebbedawaywiththeheat.ItookafewblinksbeforeIlandedwitha
thud.
抬頭一看,我看到太陽比我以前所知道的還要明亮。我看見遠處有一棵樹反射著太陽光,發(fā)出柔和的光輝。
我的意識隨著熱度而衰退。我眨了眨眼,然后摔倒在地才猛然回到現(xiàn)實中,恢復了知覺。(特殊寓意)
07
Dottedwithglitteringstars,thesky,midnightblue,gavethesceneafairytalequality.
綴滿星光的天空,午夜的藍色,給了這一場景一個童話般的質量。(神話般美麗的夜空畫面)
08
Theraindrummedonthewindow,biddingfarewelltothelastbeamofsunlight.
雨水打著窗戶,向最后一縷陽光告別。(雨水來臨的畫面)
Kissedbytherainandglistening,thewetgroundiscoldunderfoot.Adenseearthlysweetsmellrisesfromthe
ground,envelopingeverythingwithinitssoftembrace.
潮濕的地面走起來很冷,被雨水親吻后閃閃發(fā)光。一股濃郁的泥土般的香味從地上升起,把一切都包裹在
它柔軟的懷抱里。(雨后清新的畫面)
09
TheleavescrunchedbeneathmyfeetasIstrolleddownthestreet.Occasionally,onewouldfallpastme,lightly
swayingastheairgentlycarriedittotheground.
我在街上漫步時,樹葉在我腳下嘎吱作響。偶爾,有葉子會從我身邊掉下來,輕輕地搖晃,緩緩落到到地
面。(描寫落葉的畫面)
讀后續(xù)寫精彩結尾03:對話結尾
01
Chestersaidhisfathertoldhimhehadtriedtosearchforhimandhisbrother,butbothbrothershadchangedtheir
lastnames."Hedoesremembermeandmyolderbrotherandhetoldmethathe'sbeenlookingforuseversince
welostcontact,hesaid.ChestersaidhisbrotherhassinceflowntoColombiatobereunitedwithUrreaaswell.
Whenaskedhowthereunionwithhisfatherwillchangehislife,Chestersaid,“Igotfamilyeverywhere,soit
mightleadtomanymoretripsnow.”
Chester說他父親告訴他,他曾試圖尋找他和他哥哥,但兩兄弟都改了姓。“他確實記得我和我哥哥,他告
訴我,自從我們失去聯(lián)系以來,他一直在找我們,”他說。Chester說他哥哥也飛去哥倫比亞和Urrea團聚
了。當被問及與父親的團聚會如何改變他的生活時,Chester說,“我的家人無處不在,所以現(xiàn)在可能會有
更多的出行。”
02
WhatwasmostfascinatingaboutthereunionisthatShavialsomovesothers.Nina'sfamilyhadmovedtoabigger
apartment.’Tveheardamazingstoriesaboutdogs'loyalty,butIneverimaginedthissortofthingwouldever
happentome.Evennow,Icanhardlybelievethisdogtraveledsuchalongdistancetofindus,“saidNina,"I
wouldnevergivethiskindoffriendawayagain.Inevergrowtiredofrepeatingthis一animalsarethemostdevoted
andlovingcreatures.Theyneedourloveandcare.”
這次重聚最吸引人的地方在于,沙維也打動了其他人。妮娜的家人搬到了一個更大的公寓。"我聽說過狗
狗忠心耿耿的故事,但我從沒想過這種事會發(fā)生在我身上。即使是現(xiàn)在,我也很難相信這只狗走了這么遠
的路來找我們,”妮娜說,“我再也不會放棄這樣的朋友了。我總是不厭其煩地重復這句話一一動物是最
忠誠和最可愛的生物。他們需要我們的愛和關心。”
03
HerhusbandspoketothedirectorofHeightvale,DoloresHaworth.Soonsheofferedhimajobworkingforthe
company.Shesaid,“Hejusthadabrilliantworkingattitudeandisdefinitelythetypeofemployeewearelooking
for.Iwastold,'Ifhedoesthisforfree,imaginehisjobsifhewasbeingpaid.'Imethimandhewasalovelyand
politeyoungmanandhehasalreadystartedworkingforus.”
她丈夫和Heightvale的主管DoloresHaworth談過了。很快她就給了他一份為公司工作的工作。她說,“他
的工作態(tài)度很好,絕對是我們要找的那種員工。有人告訴我,'如果他這么做是免費的,想象一下他的工
作是有報酬的。'我見過他,他是個可愛又有禮貌的年輕人,他已經開始為我們工作了。”
04Theyhungallthethingsbacktothewall.JackaskedPaisley,“Areyoureallywillingtoleadatoughlifewith
me?”Shepattedawaytheashesonhandsandlookedatthewallswithloadsofstuffonthemsatisfactorily,
saying,"Yes!Forme,itisnotasufferingtolive.”
他們把所有的東西都掛回墻上。杰克問佩斯利:“你真的愿意和我一起過艱難的生活嗎?”她拍拍手上的骨
灰,滿意地看著墻上掛滿東西的墻,說:“是的!對我來說,活著不是一種痛苦。”
G思掖劇新
◎立或示例
2024年6月全國新高考I、II卷讀后續(xù)寫真題
閱讀下面材料,根據(jù)其內容和所給段落開頭語續(xù)寫兩段,使之構成一篇完整的短文。
ImetGunteronacold,wetandunforgettableeveninginSeptember.IhadplannedtoflytoViennaandtakeabus
toPragueforaconference.Duetoabigstorm,myflighthadbeendelayedbyanhourandahalf.Itoucheddownin
Viennajust30minutesbeforethedepartureofthelastbustoPrague.ThemomentIgotofftheplane,Iranlike
crazythroughtheairportbuildingandjumpedintothefirsttaxiontherankwithoutasecondthought.Thatwas
whenImetGunter.ItoldhimwhereIwasgoing,buthesaidhehadn'theardofthebusstation.Ithoughtmy
pronunciationwastheproblem,soIexplainedagainmoreslowly,buthestilllookedconfused.WhenIwasabout
togiveup,Gunterfishedouthislittlephoneandrangupafriend.Afteraheateddiscussionthatlastedforwhat
seemedlikeacentury,Gunterputhisphonedownandstartedthecar.Finally,withjusttwominutestosparewe
rolledintothebusstation.Thankfully,therewasalongqueuestillwaitingtoboardthebus.Gunterparkedthetaxi
behindthebus,turnedaround,andlookedatmewithabigsmileonhisface.HWemadeit,“hesaid.JustthenI
realisedthatIhadinmywallet.IflashedhimanapologeticsmileasIpulledoutmyPortuguesebankcard.Hetried
itseveraltimes,butthecardmachinejustdidnotplayalong.AfeelingofhelplessnesswashedovermeasIsawthe
busqueuethinningout.Atthismoment,Gunterpointedtowardsthewaitinghallofthebusstation.Thereatthe
entrance,wasacashmachine.Ijumpedoutofthecar,madeamadrunforthemachine,andpoppedmycardin,
onlytoreadthemessage:"Outoforder.Sorry."
1.續(xù)寫詞數(shù)應為150左右;
2.請按如下格式在答題卡的相應位置作答。
Paragraph1:
IranbacktoGunterandtoldhimthebadnews.__________________________________________
Paragraph2:
Fourdayslater,whenIwasbackinVienna,IcalledGunteraspromised.
【答題思路】
1.情境分析與伏筆呼應
核心矛盾:支付失敗(葡萄牙卡被拒)VS時間緊迫(只剩2分鐘)
人物關系:Gunter已展現(xiàn)善意(冒雨送機/聯(lián)系朋友),需保持其熱心性格
伏筆提示:前文Gunter未聽清公交站名卻成功抵達(暗示文化差異或隱藏技能)
2.段落功能定位
Paragraph1:危機爆發(fā)一解決方案鋪墊(需體現(xiàn)人物成長/關系深化)
Paragraph2:結果揭示一主題升華(善意無價/跨文化友誼)
對點答案與模板匹配
Paragraph1:IranbacktoGunterandtoldhimthebadnews.
對應模板:意外轉折型+行動號召型
圖@答即
IranbacktoGunter,mybreathformingtinycloudsintheicyair,tremblingasIdeliveredthenews.Hisfacepaled,
theViennasunsetcastinglongshadowsacrosshisfurrowedbrow."Stuckagain?"hemuttered,fingersdrumming
thesteeringwheel——anervousticIhadn'tnoticedbefore.Then,likeaboltoflightning,hepulledoutaleather
walletfromhissuitpocket."AustriaCard,"hedeclared,slidinghisowncreditcardthroughthemachinewith
practicedease.Myeyeswidenedasthegreenlightflashed,thesoundofcoinsclinkinginthefareboxringing
throughthechaos.
技法拆解:
意外轉折:用"nervoustic”暗示Gunter隱藏的不安,與后文果斷行動形成反差
行動號召:Gunter主動提供解決方案,體現(xiàn)"Helpwithoutexpectation”的主題
感官矩陣:"icyair"(觸覺)+ngreenlight"(視覺)+ncoinsclinking"(聽覺)
Paragraph2:Fourdayslater,whenIwasbackinVienna...
對應模板:伏筆回收型+主題升華型
還答題
Thelinehadvanishedbythetimeweboarded,thebus'sengineroaringlikeasleepinggiantawakening.Fourdays
later,asIdialedthenumberengravedonhisbusinesscard,awarmAustrianaccentgreetedme."Miss,youoweme
thirtyeurosandaproperdinner.nWelaughed,recallinghowhe'dsecretlyphotographedmyboardingpassto
ensureIreachedPrague."No,"Iinsisted,nyoutaughtmethatsomeconnectionsaren'tabouttransactions-they're
aboutpeoplewhomaketimestandstill."
技法拆解:
伏筆回收:前文Gunter"parkedthetaxibehindthebus”的細節(jié),暗示他早有周全計劃(拍boardingpass)
主題升華:用"connectionsaren'tabouttransactions”呼應首段storm中的人性溫暖
文化映射:AustriaCard(奧地利主流支付方式)與Portuguese卡的沖突,暗含跨文化互助主題
高分要點總結
雙重伏筆利用:
物理伏筆:Gunter的"leatherwallet”(商務人士身份)
情感伏筆:前文他"smiledwidely"預示其樂于助人的本質
結尾升華技巧:
將個人經歷(錯過會議)轉化為普世價值(人與人聯(lián)結的重要性)
使用"maketimestandstill”呼應開篇storm營造的時間緊迫感
率一反三
(2025?重慶?一模)閱讀下面材料,根據(jù)其內容和所給段落開頭語續(xù)寫兩段,使之構成一篇完整的短文。
Iclosedmyeyesandliftedmyfacetowardsthesun.Ibreatheddeeply,expandingmylungswithfreshspring
air.Iwasalive.
Ihadn'tbeenabletowalktheentiredistancearoundthelakeacouplemonthsbefore.Iwasjustfinishingup
withtreatmentsforstagethreebreastcancerwhenwestartedthesewalks.Mybodywasweakandpainful.My
mindwasfoggyandforgetful.Iwouldgetlosteasilyifmyhusbandwasn'ttherewithme.
Myhusband,whoheardmybigbreathintake,askedifIwasokay.Iopenedmyeyes,lookedatthe
concernedexpressiononhisfaceandsmiled.IreassuredhimthatIwasindeedfine;normalinfact.Inthatmoment
Ifelthappy.
AsIwaslookingoverathim,myeyescaughtthesightoftwowomenrunning.Ifocusedontheirmovements.
Iwatchedwithgreatattentionastheirfeethittheroadinquickenedmovements.Theyworeblack,pinkandgreen
athleticwear,smilingandlaughingastheyran,theywerehappythatafternoontoo.
Walkingwasgettingeasierformenow.Itwasn'tgettingmyheart-rateupanymore.MydoctorsaidIneeded
agoodworkoutformyheart.Inthedaysthatfollowed,Icouldn'tstopthinkingaboutrunning.With
encouragementfrommyhusband,Isignedupforalearn-to-runclass.
Onthefirstdayofclasses,weweretodointervals(間隙)ofrunningoneminute,followedbywalkingfor
twominutes.Thatsoundedeasyenough.Myenthusiasmsoonturnedtoshockandpanic.About30secondsintothe
run,Icouldn'tbreathe.Iwasstrugglingtogetenoughairin.Myheartwaspounding.Icouldhearthepulsesinmy
ears.Sweatwasformingontomyforeheadandundermyarms,makingmeuncomfortable.Howcouldthisbe
healthy?Iwondered.IfeltlikeIwashavingaheartattack.Doubtfloodedinsidemyhead.Iwassooutofshape
andfeltsillyforbeingthere.
注意:
1.續(xù)寫詞數(shù)應為150個左右;
2.請按如下格式在答題卡的相應位置作答。
IamnotsurewhyIwentbacktothesecondclass.
Thatraceinspiredsomethinginme.
【答題思路】
1.核心矛盾與人物關系
表層矛盾:身體病痛(癌癥治療)與運動需求(心臟康復)的沖突
深層矛盾:自我否定("feltsillyforbeingthere")與內在潛能的覺醒
人物關系:丈夫從旁觀者到精神盟友的轉變
2.段落功能定位
Paragraph1:
需建立“失敗-堅持”的轉折邏輯,體現(xiàn)人物韌性的萌芽
今對應行動號召型結尾模板(展現(xiàn)主動克服困難的姿態(tài))
Paragraph2:
需完成“痛苦體驗一生命覺醒”的主題升華
f對應意象收尾型+主題升華型復合模板
對點答案與模板匹配
Paragraph1:IamnotsurewhyIwentbacktothesecondclass.
對應模板:行動號召型+矛盾修飾法
參考答案:
Itrudgedhomethatday,mylegsburningwitheachstep.Yetasduskpaintedtheskyinamber,Ifoundmyself
pacingourlivingroom,myfingersabsentmindedlytracingtheoutlineofmyrunningshoesonthecoffeetable.
Whenmyhusbandreturned,heimmediatelynoticedthedeterminedsetofmyjaw."You'rethinkingaboutit,“he
said,placingahandonmyshoulder.Hiswordsstruckachord——areminderthatcowardicewouldn'thealmybody
orsoul.Thenextmorning,withoutwaitingforhimtourgeme,Ilacedupmysneakersandheadedtothetrack.
1.技法拆解:
行動號召型:用"pacing...table"/"lacedupsneakers"等動作細節(jié)替代心理獨白
矛盾修飾法:"burninglegs"與"eterminedjaw"形成身體痛苦與精神堅韌的張力
伏筆回收:前文丈夫的"concernedexpression"在此轉化為精神支持
Paragraph2:Thatraceinspiredsomethinginme.
對應模板:意象收尾型+主題升華型
參考答案:
Monthslater,asIcrossedthefinishlineofmyfirst5K,thesundippedbelowthehorizonlikemoltengold.My喘
息、echoedtherhythmofmypoundingheart,yetthistime,itwasn'tabattleagainstsuffocation—itwasa
symphonyofsurvival.Tearsblurredmyvisionnotfi'ompain,butfi'omtheoverwhelmingrealizationthatI'd
outlivedmyprognosisbyrunning.Theracehadbecomemorethanexercise-itwasmydeclarationofdefiance
againstadiseasethatsoughttostealmybreath,myjoy,myveryexistence.
1.技法拆解:
意象收尾型:
"moltengold"隱喻夕陽與重生希望的雙重意象
"symphonyofsurvival"將生理反應升華為精神勝利
主題升華型:
用"declarationofdefiance"將個人經歷提升至生命抗爭的高度
"stealmybreath"呼應前文跑步時的窒息感,形成閉環(huán)結構
2.高分要點總結
雙重線索編織:
明線:從病弱到奔跑者的身體蛻變
暗線:從自我懷疑到生命掌控的精神覺醒
感官矩陣升級:
原文:"sweatformingontomyforehead"(觸覺)
升華:"tearsblurredmyvision"(視覺)+"symphonyofsurvival"(聽覺通感)
文化隱喻運用:
"5Krace”象征生命馬拉松
''prognosis"(醫(yī)學預測)與"defiance”(人文抗爭)形成二元對立
感敦型藏關
Passage1
(2025?廣東肇慶?二模)閱讀下面材料,根據(jù)其內容和所給段落開頭語續(xù)寫兩段,使之構成一篇完整的短文。
Simonwasthestaroftheschoolsportsteam.Helovedthethrillofoutrunningthewindandcrossingthe
finishlinefirst.Hisnamewasalwaysonthetipofeveryone'stonguewhenitcametoschoolsportsevents.
Hislittlebrother,Charlie,lovedrunningtooandhadalwaysbeenafanofSimon.Headmiredhisbrother
fromthebottomofhisheart,hiseyeswidewithexcitementasSimonspedpasteveryoneonthetrack.Hewantedto
belikeSimonandfeelthewindinhishairasheran.Charlie?sdreamofbeingarunnergrewlikeatinyseed,but
wasovershadowedbyhisbrother'sbrightlight.HerealizedhecouldneverrunasfastasSimondid:Hisfeetfelt
heavyonthetrack,andhisheartwasevenheavierwithfear.
Astheannualschoolsportsdayapproached,Charliesawthenoticeontheschoolbulletinboard.Hisheart
didalittledance.Arunningrace!Hewantedtobeapartofit,tofeeltheexcitementthatSimonfelt.Witha
tremblinghand,Charliewrotehisnameonthelistandsignedupfortherunningrace,whichwouldtakeplacein
twoweeks.
Thatnight,hecouldn'tsleep,hismindracingwithworries.Hetossedandturned,picturinghimselftripping
andfalling.Whatifhelost?Whatifeveryonelaughedathim?Hecouldn'tcontainhimselfandsobbedquietly.He
feltasifhewasatinybirdtryingtoflyalongsideaneagle.
WhenSimonfoundCharliecryinginhisroom,heknewsomethingwasup."Heybuddy,whafsallthis?”he
askedsoftly,hisfacefilledwithconcern.Charlielookedupathisbigbrotherwithalongsighandsaid,64Iamgoing
tolose,Simon.I'mnotlikeyou.Iwillneverrunasfestasyoudo.”
注意:
1.續(xù)寫詞數(shù)應為150左右;
2.請按如下格式在答題卡的相應位置作答。
Para1.SimongaveCharlieapatonthebackandsmiled.
Para2.Twoweekslater,Charliestoodatthestartingline.
Passage2
(2025?湖南長沙?一模)閱讀下面材料,根據(jù)其內容和所給段落開頭語續(xù)寫兩段,使之構成一篇完整的短文。
ItwasNewYear'sDay.Imadearesolutiontofindmystray(走失的)dog,Puppy-Rocky.Inthemorning,I
couldhearicyrainknockingthewindows.IsaidaquickprayerforPuppy-Rocky.Hewasouttheresomewherein
thestorm,andIcouldjustfeelit.Sure,ithadbeenthreemonthssincehe'dgonemissing,butIstillhadfaith.Itwas
theseasonformiracles(奇跡).
Thatfall,Puppy-Rocky,mysweetdog,haddisappearedfrommyparents'houseinCalifornia.Hehadbeen
stayingwiththemwhileIwasbetweenapartments.Atthetime,IlivedandworkedinNewYorkCity.Iwasstaying
withfriendsuntilIsignedmylease(租約)onanewplace.Puppy-Rockyhadgottenoutofmyparents5housetwo
daysbeforeIwassettoflybackhometopickhimup.
MymomandIspentthatentirevisitsearchingforhim.Momwasthefamily'sresident"realist”,which
meantshespentawholelotoftimetryingtopreparemefortheworst."He'seitherbeenhitbyacarorbeentaken
inbysomeonewhofoundshesaid.Irolledmyeyes.Momalwayssupportedme,butthistimeshedoubted.
Shecouldhavedonewithalittlemorefaith!
Besides,thoughIcouldn,texplainit,IbelievedI'dseemyPuppy-Rockyagain.Hisbarksneverfadedaway.
He'dbeenhomelesswhenIfirstmethim,anaughtylittledogthathadsurvivedallonhisown.Ifanydogcoulddo
theimpossible,itwasmyPuppy-Rocky.EvenafterIreturnedtoNewYorkCitywithouthimandtheweeks
stretchedintomonths,deepdownIhadthisfeelingthatwe'dbereunited.
Now,homeagainfortheholidays,Iwasdeterminedtopickupmysearch.IgrabbedPuppy-Rocky'scarrier,
loadeditintothecar,andthenaskedmymomtodrivemetotheshelterforthehomelessdogs,hopinghe'dbeen
found.
“Dave,youhavetoberealistic,mymomsaidasweheadedtothegarage."He'sbeengonetoolong.You're
notgoingtofind
注意:
1.續(xù)寫詞數(shù)應為150左右;
2.請按如下格式在答題卡的相應位置作答。
“Don'tyoubelieveinNewYearmiracles?”Iasked.
WhenIsteppedintothelastroomoftheshelter,afamiliarbarkcameintomyears.
Passage3
(24-25高三上?廣東深圳?期末)閱讀下面材料,根據(jù)其內容和所給段落開頭語續(xù)寫兩段,使之構成一篇完
整的短文。
Jeremy,at75,hadbecomeusedtolivingaloneinhisquiethometownwithhiswifegonefor10years.He
filledhisdayswithhousework,withoutanycompany,notevenapet.Inwinter,heoftensatbythefireplace,
wrappedinablanketanddrinkinghotmilk,withlonelinessfillingeverycornerofthehouse.
Warnedbythegovernment,asnowstormwasapproaching.Jeremywasjustabouttogotobedwhenhe
heardastrangenoisefromhisbackyard,cuttingthroughthequietevening.
Confused,Jeremyputonhisthickestcoatandwenttowardsthebackya
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